Balance, Busy, Crazy Mom Head, Massage, Meaningful work, PTSD
So I don’t know about this whole working mom thing. Going from a Stay at Home role to a working mom role has been tough. There are a lot of differences between being a Stay at Home Mom and being A Working Mom. I really don’t feel like I do much less at home now, being a working mom vs when I was not working. I just have more to do. I have to be more organized and I don’t have the time. For example, I used to wait until the down times to go to Costco, you would not catch me there on the weekend. But now that I have a day time job, but now, I have to go when I can go (and sometimes that is the weekend when it is busy). It is things like this that I was not prepared for when I chose to go back to work. I plan to to schedule my life better.
I have talked about this thought about it but it is time to actually do it. I found a few minutes of extra time tomorrow I will use that to sit down and plan life. I want to plan when to cook, when to shop, when to clean, when to work. I want to continue to do it all, I don’t want to have to sacrifice anything (but I do). I want to continue to volunteer at school (which is getting a bit less as the kids get older there is not as much that the teachers need, at least not this year). I want to keep the house clean and organized (not that I was very good at that even before I worked). I want to still have time for date nights with the hubs and of course have time to actually work and work on growing my business.
So here is the plan: Compress my working days and times, schedule a laundry and house work day and schedule a day to work on business and volunteer at school. Consider what amount of money I need to make each month and how to better utilize it. Figure out work logistics and make sure I set very good boundaries and am satisfied with work and don’t get resentful about my work.
I had a great massage this morning. My client was very appreciative and gave me great feedback. I felt trusted and like I knew what I was doing. Sometimes it feels like I am working so hard and the client doesn’t like what I am doing or I don’t know, and sometimes, they don’t get better or they don’t like what I do and blame me for it, or at least I feel like they do. Then I question myself like “do I really know what I am doing” Today I felt like I knew what I was doing. I have been doing this for almost 17 years and I have taught massage therapy and I really do know what I am doing! I like doing massage but burn out has been kind of setting in and I need to get back to loving what I do and that comes from having a better plan and better boundaries and more realistic expectations at work. In my work, I want to do more work with PTSD patients and more work with folks who are healthy but in pain or stressed and need my help to feel righted, like my client this morning! I would like to figure out where I can get a grant to do work with Military Vets who struggle with PTSD and re-entering the real world after being in or being trained to be in a war. I think massage is a valid and important piece of whole health and wellness!
I just want to do good work and I want to make impact on people who need me and want me. I want to be happy with my life and by my life what I mean “my life” includes providing support emotionally, physically, and now financially to my family! I also want to be able to take care of myself, my family’s mom and wife so that I can do the best that I can for them and for my clients! My family is my why. Why I do what I do is for them!