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Category Archives: Do You

Vacation for Me talk Health

18 Monday May 2020

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Connection, Do You, Don't judge me, Live in the Moment, Live life

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mental health, Self Care, Vacation?, wellness

Happy Monday SLWC-ers! This post is coming to you from our rented Hertz Hendrick SS Camaro. The Hubs and I are road tripping to visit a friend today. We took our family on vacation to see their Grandparents and we have friends who live a few hours away. Everytime we come to the in-laws we always consider this road trip but have never done it. Since we’re all in quarantine and can’t do much anyway we figured this is the best trip to road trip it.

What I have noticed about this vacation so far is that I really needed it. It is no secret I have not been doing well with this whole quaratine thing! I am surrounded by people who I don’t feel really understand what I am lacking and why I am so off kilter. When you go from seeing and connecting with people everyday to only seeing your family it affects you, and for me it has been a negative affect. For some it has been super positive, they are living their best life and are dreading going back to “normal” that’s just not me. We are all trying to figure out how to manage I this new circumstance and in reality maybe they do understand and I don’t understand them? Or we don’t know how to communicate this right now. What I do know is that they love me and I love them and I am going to work to bridge this gap as I believe it exists in a lot of places I. Our world right now. The word is acceptance, of others and ourselves. As well as acceptance of not knowing or understanding and not being okay.

Moral of the story today is that I want to encourage you to live your best life. First, take a step back and figure out what you need. That is way easier said than done, but it is essential! I kind of needed this shut down in a way, I was burnt out and I needed a reset. I needed time to slow down and figure out what I needed. I need connection. For me I get connection from human contact and human touch. I kind of suck at text message or phone call relationships be it business or personal, it is hard for me to not see touch or feel a person’s presence. I need touch and eye contact. I feel whole with connection and that connection is not made without touch. I have seen friends and we do the nod, or wave and it pains me to not connect with a hug or hand shake. So I have learned I need touch.

Second, make sure the ones you love know what it is you need. If you need touch or eye contact, to hear their voice or be in the same place (6 feet apart of you have to) tell them! It took me over a month of the stay at home order to figure out why I was going so crazy. It hit me one day that I am so used to being so intimate and connected to people, even in the professional level of therapeutic massage, that my whole life relies on that. There have been multiple studies on this but if you work with inadamant objects like computers or refrigerators you may not understand half of what people who normal work with people are missing in life in the stay at home order. My point here in this paragraph started as tell those around about this so they understand where you are coming from.

Your people need to know that you know what you need. I want to tell you, it’s okay if it’s not what your partner or rest of your family needs and it makes communication even more important. I still struggle with this. I know I need human connection but how do I tell my family and how do I get that when we are in quaratine and social distancing orders? And when I say that and they look at me like I’m speaking Greek how do I explain more? The answer is, you don’t. Stop trying to justify yourself. So instead of explaining and justifying to those around you that you think don’t understand you, accept yourself. It’s okay if they do t understand,now they know what you need. Tell them what you need and leave it at that. I need human connection. I need hugs and hand shakes. I need face to face in person connection with people. I thrive at being the highlight of a person’s day, which is why I became a Massage Therapist. It feeds my sole to help someone get out of pain and be able to manage their life better with less pain. These are my why’s of doing my job. I have accepted that and it’s my job to be sure to make that happen in my life. That is part of me taking care of me. The tough part is for the last 8 weeks, I haven’t been able to do that.

Taking this vacation was so much needed for me. I needed to get out of my head where I was upset with myself for not feeling good enough for not being able to feel good. I have struggled, why isn’t this life good enough? Our family is blessed that The Hubs still has his job and we have been able to save money not going out that all our bills are paid and we have even put money away in savings during this time. We are blessed so many people are so much in a harder place. So why am I struggle so hard? Stop judging yourself! Human connection is a real need. I’m not getting as much as I was before and that’s the missing link. Taking this vacation I have been better able to stop judging myself and stop hating on myself. I’m not killing my side hustle sales business and the house is not spotless and I’m not a steller homeschooler, I don’t even know if my kids are really doing school some days. On vacation, here, I have been able to let that shit go! I have been able to look at my kids who are healthy and young who should be enjoying life as much as learning. They will never get this young age back again. They should be seeing their mom take care of herself in a way that she wants them to take care of themselves when they grow up. That’s my job right now. With this vacation I have been able to reset myself. Kind of hit the reboot for my brain. To look at what’s important and guess what ( sorry for saying this Hubs) chores being done, dinner on the perfectly set table, kids studiously learning and not fighting, everything in its place, is not really the most important. The most important thing is what’s going on in our heads. Do we love ourselves? Do we love what we have? Are we appreciating eachother? Are we taking care of what we need in our own lives? Are we allowing the ones around us to do the same? That is what is important!

So, forget the fucking dishes, go to bed early and fuck like bunnies. Teach the kids life lessons like how to change the oil in your car or change a tire when you can’t figure out how to help with math. Do something you all enjoy and enjoy each othermaybe take a walk.

Manage your me talk health. Exercise is the most underused medication for mental health. Mental health is just that how well are we mentally? Can we handle our emotions? Me talk health isn’t always being happy,it is handling life when we are sad or frustrated or not getting everything we want or need and knowing how to go about making it right. Talk about your feelings,good and bad they are all okay there are healthy ways to ha dle all of our emotions!

It’s the people that matter in life most of all the person who you are ultimately responsible is you. Make your self happy and you will see the world opens up! Take a vacation if you can it’s easier to see yourself.

#MentalHealth2020

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XXX-More-gasms-XXX

13 Wednesday May 2020

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be You, Do You, Hump Day Challenge, Just Do It, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes, XXX

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Multiples, women were made for multiples

Hello SLWC-ers!

What day is it? It’s Wednesday, hump day challenge day! Happy Hump Day Challenge Day!!! So today’s Hump Day Challenge comes to you via inspiration I got when I was driving to see our friends the other day. They live about an hour away and on the way the Hubs were listening to Vivid radio on the SiriusXM radio. They were talking about an article in Cosmo about multiple orgasms! She referred to it as “More-gasms” not sure how to spell that! Anyway, tonight’s hump day challenge is to have Moregasmsn! Never had it? Well prepare to be amazed! You see women’s bodies are primed and prepped to be able to have multiples, we don’t need time to regenerate and get ready to go again we can just keep going and going. Did you not know that? Well, yes, it is a thing!

So tonight, you will need to know the 5 things cosmo says I’m going to list them here and you can read the whole article here. I’m going to try to make this post short so you can get to your moregasms! You will also need a man who is patient and loves to see you in ecstasy!

Multiple Os

Here are the 5 tips summarized and Ruby-ized

1. Be open minded to having multiples. If you leave the option open and don’t expect the orgasm to be the finale it will open you up for the possibility. It is important to relax and accept more. Just be you, relax and enjoy! Make sure you man knows what his task is, multiple orgasms for you and don’t worry, he will get his reward at the end.

2.  Kegals. Strong kegal muscles help lead to not only pleasurable sexual experiences in general but to the possibility of multiple orgasms. Do some keglas right now to help prep yourself to be ready! (Your lover will enjoy them when you do them during sex too.) Training your kegals regularly will help you strengthen your pelvic floor muscles and increase enjoyment of your man while inside you when you squeeze down on him too. The key is not only strong muscles but blood flow as well, keep it flowing!

3. Foreplay, especially oral sex. Have him make out with your pussy. Focus on that clitoris  but take breaks by licking around your vagina in all directions, lick around and suck on the labia and change directions to give that clit a break as you get closer to climax and then dive back in on that beautiful clit and then break again. This will be training your body to get used to getting intense and close and giving a mini break and hit it strong again. Have him add in some fingers in your pussy too and even playing with some back door fingering or licking and then back to that clit with some added double penetration sometimes.

4. Take a break. When it gets intense and you get close and even after you cum take a short timeout, we all like to pull away and relax and cuddle after the big o but instead of pulling completely, just take a break. Give him a kiss and make out with him. If he knows you are working to have multiples he will enjoy getting some attention go down on him practice your oral on him when you have had enough of a break (just take a short one) lay him on his back keep sucking him off and put your vagina in his face to lick and kiss and make out with that pussy some more. Now you are on top and you have control. Rub your clit on his face(they love that). Remember, men don’t really have multiples so be careful not to take him too far with your mouth, before you come again and again. Keep him right on the edge and hard and you will be dripping wet and he will be lapping you up and loving every  single one of your O’s almost as much as you. This brings us right to  our last tip.

5. Pick your position wisely.  Being on top or maybe in doggy lets you have control to move away or closer. Also gives you access to that clit. Stimulating your clit is a great way to orgasm and for some women the only way to actually have an orgasm. Clitoral stimulation either by him or by yourself (don’t be shy guys like it when we touch ourselves) is a great way to achieve orgasm be it the first orgasm or the fifth! Ride the wave and keep it going as long as you want and/or as long as you can keep him hard and stimulated and hold him off from cumming.

When your ready to finish him off and give him his reward for loving you in such a way and letting you climax and cum so many times choose your favorite position and make sure it’s one he likes too, to give him an orgasm that will also get you off one last time. My preference is to end in missionary with the hubs on top driving his cock deep in my pussy while I play with my clit and we both come together at the same time. His cock is pulsing and I am squeezing my pussy kegal style on his cock when I get the biggest O of them all. 

So have Moregasms today. Be open minded to it! Relax and don’t force it but be ready and prepare for it! Head over to Cosmo and read that article for more details and enjoy some multiple orgasms and another night of #QuarantineSex

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Dance Stress

04 Sunday Feb 2018

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Dance, Dance Like No One is Watching, Do You, Kids, Live in the Moment, Love, Nothing Meaningful, Parenting, Schedule

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Dance Competition, Dance Conventions, Dance it out, professionalism

It is mid dance convention weekend. There has been some stress, but the Girl has danced her heart out and done amazing as have her teammates! The kids are doing an amazing job! I love watching her dance! We we’re there at 7am until 10:30pm I’m spent. I had a great day and will talk about my day more as the week goes on and when I am not so exhausted!

#SLWC2018

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Give Yourself Time to Adjust

05 Friday Jan 2018

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be You, Do You, New Year, Planning, Uncategorized

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Not Yet, Sex everyday, Starting everything Monday

Resolution writing everyday here I am writing at 10:06pm on my phone as the kids fill their bowls with ice cream. I had one massage and did a cake today. Did not have a shower…or wash my face but am still on the sex everyday track, and if I am correct I at at 6 even though today is only the 5th yes we’ve had one two a day! I have yet to log any miles running this year hopefully tomorrow will be my day. I have decided to start on all everything officially on Monday. I am being a little easy on myself this year. I will follow through I just am better if I start on a Monday! The family has our meeting for goals that will be the kick off! I sound so lazy! Oh well! Do the best you can with what you can. Tomorrow I will write more. The Fam is watching Truman Show.

I feel like this was a waisted blog post. Well, at least I wrote! Work in progress we all are!

#GiveYourselfGrace2018

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This Growing up Thing is Hard on Me

05 Wednesday Jul 2017

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be Present, Be You, Dance, Dance Like No One is Watching, Do You, Live in the Moment, Parenting

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Dance, Dance Life, get over yourself, I love watching her dance!, I made her, Love, Mom Life, Parenting is Hard

Well, it has been a while since I have written. I can’t even remember when…to my loyal readers apologies. Today I am writing from Nationals. The Girl is competing in a Nationals Dance Competition. She is in 5 group numbers and a solo. Have I said how much I love to watch her dance? If you have read my blog you have read that a few times! This year the Girl turned 13, she is starting to become her own person. Not that she hasn’t always been her own person but she is just starting to grow up. She definitely wants her own identity. It used to be cute that everyone loved her mom and loved her mom being around but now it’s just not. Not to her anyway. The older dancers are still super sweet to me and seem to understand my pain when I am shunned by my daughter but the Girl just wants to grow her wings. I need to get out of her way and let her make a name for her.

This dance year I have decided it is my job to support her. Many things I hear my Coach Husband say is that parents just need to get out of their kids way. I need to learn that lesson it has been my mom work this year. There is a dance instructor for Liz Imperio who teaches a class called Raising Successful Children that I started but got too busy to finish the webinar (which has been a theme in my life this year) and it’s focus was to guide us parents in how to get out of our children’s way. I love watching her grow, I love watching her dance! There is a part of me that is struggling letting go of that mommy role that needs to be there to protect and guide my child. She is growing up I have taught her to think for herself and stand up for what is right and to advocate for herself. She doesn’t need me to do that because I taught her to be strong in herself! I taught her to not define herself in what other people think of her. And she does not. She changes for no one. She is who she is, she likes what she likes and for the most part doesn’t care or waiver for anything. Not even for me! Sometimes I wish she would for me but I should be proud that she doesn’t. Sometimes she does waiver to fit in with her friends. I feel for her in those moments because I have spent my life doing that and that is not what I want for her! I want her to be her, even if it hurts my feelings.

How did I teach her to do that when I am not strong in myself? How can I be that strong human I am teaching her to be when I am not that strong human myself? I am proud that she is independent. I love who she is. Sometimes I wish there was less Diva but other times I am so proud of that diva because that Dive protects her when mean girls are mean. And that Diva protects the girl who is getting picked on in a group by my child being the one to stand up to the mean one in the place of the child who is getting picked on or feeling bad when that child is too weak. I am proud of that diva! I pray that when I stifle the diva for my feelings that I don’t stifle the good out of her diva! How was I able to teach her these things? I have no idea how, but I am proud she has learned them!

I am going through yet another identity crisis in parenting, and I don’t even know what it is. I am obviously still her mom and she needs me and I know deep down she wants me around, but she wants me to keep my distance and not over shadow who she is or what she does. I get it! I was there, I may still be there with my mom. When she needs me I will be there. I have seen this happen recently. She does talk to me like a friend sometimes and I to her but she also knows that she must do what she is told and what is expected of her. I don’t really believe in being your child’s best friend until they are adults anyway but sometimes she is mine. She is the only one who can’t leave me and would never think of it, I think… Anyway, I want her to continue to grow in success and keep that diva spunk that will take her far and I just have to get over myself!

Now I have to go watch her solo I am so excited to see her dance! I love watching her on stage and in her element. It is her happy place I am so glad she has dance for that, lord knows she needs a place of her own to just BE. I love her!

#Dance2017dance parent

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To drug or not to drug….

11 Sunday Jun 2017

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be You, Do You, Don't judge me, Kids, Live in the Moment, Mom Stuff, Parenting, Working Mom

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ADD, Decisions, Do Your Best, How Do I Know?, know yourself, medication, treatment

This video (click to view link) hits home for me! So much shame in my life not as a child but as an adult, I was diagnosed as an adult with ADD! I  feel, I made it through as a child because I am a people pleaser so being a good student and approval from teachers when I did well is what drove me and made me succeed. Thank goodness I am pretty smart and Thank goodness I had great teachers and parents who gave me that approval!!

ADDSince being diagnosed, I have not found a medication that works for me. I kind of have something against taking medication. I don’t really know what, but I just don’t want to admit to myself and everyone else that I have to take medication to be normal! I also think I don’t want to admit there is a normal and that I’m not normal! I kind of hate that word “normal” it is what most “normal” people think is normal and if you have ADD, it is not “normal” for your brain to function as a “normal” person’s brain functions. Your brain does not decipher a hierarchy of things that are important or stay focused on the task at hand or manage time well. A person with ADD has to remind their mind what the task at hand is. We, ADD folks are great at living in the moment! I am a great forgiver! I forgive a lot of times when I probably shouldn’t. I think of something that would be a great idea and I jump on it! If I have time (or if I perceive I have time or if it is really important or interesting or something that I perceive as pressing) I get on it right away, I don’t want to forget about it. Forgetfulness is a big part of ADD. A lot of people see it as a kid who can’t sit still or walk, they always run….it is so much more than that! Do I want my brain to function like “normal”? Won’t that change me? As much as I “hate” myself and they way my brain works, I don’t want “me” to change. See my dilemma?…

I have self medicated with food and sometimes alcohol and thank goodness I have stayed away from illegal drugs, credit to the DARE program for that! But taking the stigma off of “drugs” proven to help ADHD’ers would definitely change my world of shame… So much shame in my life. My son is just like me, forgetful, figgidity, and impulsive….. Not driven as much by people pleasing but then again his dad and I are tough on him so he doesn’t get the praise as much as I did, and he is just like his dad, he is confident almost a little arrogant. He is more solid in what he likes and who he is. It’s not as important to him to impress people the way it was (and still is) to me. I worry about my son turning into me or worse than me. I have a husband who keeps me straight. He pays the bills, I would struggle remembering those things. Will my son be able to do those things that are important. Will my son remember to turn in his homework?… does he need medication? Do I? Will it help? How can I tell? I should get my shit together first before diagnosing or assuming anything about him. ADD is genetic as much as the color of your eyes, of course one of the kids has it but what to do???

So many questions all I know is that, this video hit home. Lot’s of things in my life right now are up in the air and there are a lot of questions in my not so distant future. Lot’s of decisions that can alter my life’s direction. ADD is a big deal to me, it is a big frustration in our lives. Actually our lives are complicated, every parents life is complicated, ADD makes it more difficult. Medication is not for everyone, acceptance is. I have neither for myself and here I am without a mom to drive me to a psychologist like the girl in the video I am an adult now trying to navigate and wanting so badly a mommy to tell me what the right direction is and take me there! I was not diagnosed as having ADD as a 6 year old but right now I feel like it has reduced me to a 6 year old, in that I don’t know what to do, and I can’t function but please don’t treat me like a child!!!

If this is a little disjointed, think of it as a taste of how an ADD brain works…very disjointed distracted and impulsive…..lacking direction sometimes…..wanting so badly to get noticed and get my point across and be understood but lacking the brain function and organization to do so…. and add to that, trying to do it in a short amount of time because of course I didn’t give myself enough time, it was an impulsive moment that I had something to say!

#ADDbrain

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Live Stop Worrying

27 Monday Mar 2017

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be Present, Be You, Do You, Don't judge me, Family, Love, Uncategorized

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Balance, Don't Judge Me, Embrace life, Focus, Live Laugh Love, Stop worrrying, why can I trust life, Why can't I Just relax and enjoy life, worried something bad is happening

worryingHello followers, let me start by saying. I am struggling.  Acutely today I have so much on my mind, so much that has happened, so much I want to accomplish and so much to write and share (because I haven’t written much lately)  and also some to keep private and not write about (we all know that is hard for me not to over share) and since I haven’t been blogging much this may be a little disjointed, I mean, more than normal. I was asked the other day to remove my filter…they obviously don’t read my blog or maybe they do because they know it’s possible for me to do so. But yes, in real life I have this filter. Call it a mask of sometime professionalism, sometimes shyness, just a filter that I don’t say everything I am afraid to be judged or I want to make sure I am being appropriate…I don’t really know why. So hear goes sans filter Ruby is going to spill and hopefully today organize my thoughts and life and get back on track where I want to be. And for you I hope you can be inspired by my thoughts either by realizing you are not as messed as me or by realizing you are not alone out there.

Why the fuck is it so hard to just live? I want to do so much but for some reason I am so tired. I get going and then my energy fizzles out. Today I wanted to get in a run, do some admin business stuff, some billing and returning phone calls, also wanted to clean and organize at the house catch up with laundry. This morning was a great breakfast. I was able to get the kids lunches made, then I made them breakfast. I made eggs, English muffin toast, strawberries and smoothies for the kids. The boy we struggle with eating and he ate his whole breakfast today. I was on a roll. Then they both got to school and I got home and had to do some computer stuff. Then it was almost 10:00 and I had to decide what to do…go for a run, or get ready and get to a business networking thing at 11:30 or do something else like clean or write in my blog…

Why the fuck can’t I just make the right choice for myself? Why don’t I do what I want to do to get me closer to where I want to be. I want to be a great mom that takes care of her family by cooking and cleaning and having a relaxed calm home environment. I also want to have a successful business and sometimes that means making sacrifices at home but I hate choosing which has to sacrifice. Balance is just not always an option!! But it has to be! We need balance to be healthy! Everyone does! Sometimes I feel like I am getting it and then the next day shit hits the fan and I am feeling fucked and not in a good way! I just want to figure life out why this fuck is it so hard?!

And why is it that when I feel like I have things under control the bottom drops out? So even when things are good, really things are pretty goo right now. Business is doing alright, life is good the Hubs and I are getting along and happy but this is how I felt in December when my life got turned upside down! I was getting in the groove of working the business, The Hubs and I were happy. I had some great (I thought) friends in my life all was well. Then the bottom dropped out. I am kind of waiting for that to happen right now. Life has really felt like it has slowed down. You know the way that commentators talk about the game slowing down for rookies in the NFL. Nothing changes they just get used to seeing the speed of the NFL vs College etc. Life has really felt like it’s slowed down and we are in the midst of competition and tournament season! What horrible thing is about to happen or has already happened that I am about to find out? Why the fuck do I have to think this way? Why can’t I relax and enjoy life? Why can’t I remove the filter? What am I afraid of?

PLAN: Here is my plan what I want anyway. I want to write more, exercise more, enjoy the moments I have with my family and have moments with myself and one on one time with the Hubs, and be successful in business so I can help my family do everything and have everything we want. Just that sentence brings tears to my eyes because it feels like so much and I am sad I have to say it out loud, how did I let myself get here away from these things? I should plan time for everything. Time for writing and exercising in my schedule and push myself to follow it. Get my house cleaned up and organized and then take time to keep it that way and having the business I may need to hire a housecleaner to help keep up on the house thing. I need a better plan and more than just giving myself grace I need to trust myself when I am feeling like things are slowing down. The game really is slowing down for me! I need to accept that. It’s time to pass the ball to my trusted teammates and manage this game in a way that will most benefit the team! I need to be MVP in my life so my team can win and winning is when we are all happy and healthy and enjoying life! That is balance!

What the fuck did I just say?! I really need to stay focused and push myself to get where I want to be and I need to pass the ball to those who can advance our life when needed. I need to stop worrying about the lineman who is going to hit me from the blindside and focus on the play and execute! I have a team to support me and need to use that. But it’s my job to manage this game I can and I will rock this. I need to allow myself to live and enjoy and celebrate the good times and stop worrying!

#Live2017

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Shitty 2016? Do You in 2017

30 Friday Dec 2016

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be Present, Be You, Do You, Love, Marriage, Marriage is hard, Marriage is work

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Choose love, how do you respond?, I choose to make my own way, life sucks sometimes, live in love, Shitty things happen in life, Sucky situations

Well, if you have been reading my blog this month you probably have been wanting more. You probably have figured out that I am having a rough month. To top it off, yesterday, actually the day before yesterday, after a full day at work my neck started bothering me. It is a C2 type feeling pain. I have regular chiropractic adjustments, C2 is my headache spot and it was feeling out of alignment. By yesterday morning I was in excruciating pain. I don’t normally cancel work or ask friends for favors but I had to do both. I canceled all 4 of my massages (which all happened to be PIP claims) and then I called my Chiropractor who is off this week and he had me come to his house to work on me. My massage therapist coworker (who is actually the boss lady at my office) offered to work on me as well she was going to add me to her already booked schedule. I am laid up today as well. I was trembling in pain last night. I went to bed at 8 and didn’t get up until 8 this morning. Since I have got out of bed is has gotten worse. That whole gravity thing is weighing down on me. I am frustrated that I have to take it easy. I am angry that the end of December and the end of 2017 ends on a negative note.

This has been a rough month. The Hubs and I have been through the wringer. A bad event happened the beginning of the month. We have been dealing with it ever since. I have struggle with the idea of sticking it out. I wanted to just leave my marriage my family and my life and go it alone. This life is too short to live unhappy. If shitty things are going to keep happening then why stay in this relationship. We fight like cats and dogs. There is yelling and threats and insults and all of this happens, sometimes, in front of the kids. They have been changed by the way they have seen their parents argue! It makes me sad and ashamed. I am ashamed of myself for putting up with it, for perpetuating it and not doing anything to change it, or at least not enough. But what can I do? Leave my husband? end the marriage? give my kids two addresses? One of which would be in poverty because I am too busy being a mom than to make money. Anyway I have decided to stick it out. I can’t bring my self to leave. There is a part of me that wants to and a part of me that wants the happily ever after with my high school sweetheart. I also am not ready to dismantle my family. I also took my “till death do us part” and “for better or worse” vows very seriously. I know there are a lot of people saying “there is a better way” but I don’t know if I want that way. Nor do I know if I am ready to move away from the good stuff that we do have.

2016 has been rough… actually December of 2016 has been rough. With all that has been going on in my life I have been comforting myself with food. Eating my feelings! I have been through a tragic event in my marriage, lost my only friend who I could talk to about it and now I have an injury that has sidelined me from work, exercise and life in general. I have had a shitty month. I have been eating my feelings. I have talked to some friends but don’t want to talk about it much. Especially since a lot the advice I have gotten has been “things can be better, you can do it all alone. Don’t worry about the money. You’re stillcircumstances-make-me young you have a lot of life in front of you.” I hate all of that advice. I am not as strong as those people think I am. Those people mostly have been divorced or never married or are single. Some are more happy than they were in their first marriage too… But, I can’t do it. I want my marriage to work I want to be happy. I don’t know if either is possible but I can’t not try. I start counseling again on Monday. I (we) have decided to work this relationship. I will John Gottman the shit out of this and make it work if it kills me…and it might. I also know I need to stop sulking and live my life and watch what I eat. I have eaten my feelings to the tone of 8.7 pounds since this started.

I started this  blog in 2015 (well end of 2014) to prove that sex, love and washing clothes can save a relationship. I am going to put this into practice in 2017. It is more than just the actions of having sex and cleaning house it takes that middle word, love. I honestly believe LOVE can change the world. Love is something you have to choose. It does not choose you. You choose love. I am choosing love, I am choosing to live this life that I have and love it. All the shitty circumstances are just that, Shitty!!! I refuse to let them slow me down and make me sad anymore. It sucks but you know what, you have shitty things you have lived with, don’t you? Well, maybe you haven’t. Maybe you have moved on and maybe you are happy to not have that in your face everyday. I have never chosen the easy path, I have chosen that hard path and right now honestly either path is not an easy path for me. Is there ever an easy path? I want my family to thrive. I see some counseling not only in my future but also in my families future. I know we are going to need professional help to get through this but we will come out stronger and better than ever. In a year we will be in a different place, I look forward to seeing what that means in my life!

There is a lot of work to be done here. Please don’t judge me or my family or anyone else. We all have our own battles to face and we will make some good choices and some that could have been better. Do you make the choices for you or for what people will say about you…do it for you! I am doing it for me! Do you in 2017 I am going to do ME!

#Future2016

 

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Let Go

10 Monday Oct 2016

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be Present, Be You, Do You, Love, Relax

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accept you, be nicer to yourself, I will let go of indecision, I will not let others judgements affect me, Let Go, let go of other's judgements, Love you, trust yourself

I started this blog to inspire people. That’s why I write. I am learning to let go. I am not there yet but this inspires me!

#LetGo2016

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Sex for Stress

13 Tuesday Sep 2016

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be You, Dance, Do You, Do Your Thing, Family, Uncategorized

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Busy, growing supportive women, miss blogging everyday, Sex reduces stress, sexforstress, women support women

Hello friends. I have missed you. I miss blogging everyday! I miss sharing my stories with you. I was on the way to a Seahawks game yesterday and looked at my phone and thought of blogging but, I knew my hands would really act up and be painful if I blogged from my phone. The kids have started school. The girl said her first day was “terrible”. The boy’s first Pee Wee game was this weekend. He played amazing but the team still lost. There are so many things I want to share about every single one of these adventures but time is not on my side. Blogging is almost like a full time job or at least should be. I makes me think that maybe I need to plan my posts out better. I miss having time to blog. I also miss having sex with the hubs everyday! I miss Sex Love and Washing Clothes!!!

I love everything I am doing in my life. I love my life. The Hubs and I have had a few struggles a few weeks ago, but have got past it. Starting a new business has created a lot of stress in this household as it would in any household. Stress like that tends to cause the Hubs and I to argue a little more. More sex helps us in the arguing department so we have really (or at least I have) focused on having more sex. I know it sounds like avoiding problems but really it is coping with stress. So that has been a lot of what we do in our spare time. Which is what makes it tough right now for the Hubs to be gone for a week, he is at training for work! Boo!!!!

One more adventure that I have been working on is I am the new Drill Team Advisor at my daughter’s junior high. She has never been much interested in Drill Team but I was in Drill Team as a Jr High and High school student. It made a big impact in my life and would not want these girls to miss the opportunity and the chance to influence women of our future to get a better start being better women than we have before. Women need to be taught at a young age how to support each other and not compete with each other. We as a Drill Team are sisters and what we need to focus on is to lift up and support each other! I hope I can help the girls start a good solid life of good lady support for each other!

I need to go choreograph a tryout routine, wash dishes, do laundry and maybe even sleep. (No fucking the Hubs in gone, sadface)

#Sexforstress2016

 

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