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Category Archives: Friends

Call Your Friends

01 Thursday Feb 2018

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Connection, Dance, Do Your Thing, Don't judge me, Family, Friends, Raising Kids, Relax, Self Care, wrestling

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Coffee visits, Connection, Girlfriend time, Life is hard friends make it easier, People don't die from suicide they die from being sad, suicide prevention

Why people are sad

Happy Thursday!!! So, there has been no alcohol consumed on this First day of February but for some reason the mood in here is light and airy, unlike it has been for the last month of Dry January. It is a good day here in the Earl household! The boy is well into his first year of Middle School Wrestling and doing great. He has had 2 matches on Varsity as a 6th grader, 2 wins, 1 with a pin and one by points. Today was the points match. It was intense the kid he wrestled was good but the Boy was better. He kept focus was strong and held him off and managed to score more points even when the ref was screwed up in his scoring (he had to score a couple Take-downs before he even got points). I love watching him wrestle he is doing great!

The girl is gearing up for her first full convention and competition this weekend. She will be on her own deciding what she can do per her knee pain. She has taken today and tomorrow’s classes off to give a rest before the big weekend. I hope she can hold up with minimal set backs but sometimes when you rehab from injury and reintroduce sports and workload, that happens. This is the competition that she won their title award a few years ago. I love seeing her win awards and get scholarships but I try not to attach to much emotion to that, but it’s hard! I just love watching her dance!

Today I had a girlfriend come over for coffee. OMG was that refreshing and so enjoyable! I really needed that and I think the two of us need to do that more often! It is refreshing for the soul. Women need supportive women friends to support each other. I am so happy to have reconnected. I met this friend through my daughter. The Girl and this friends daughter have been friends since 2 grade or so. The daughter is a great friend to the Girl and the mom to me. I am just so thankful and grateful for her. We had a great visit talking about everything under the sun even gossiping about our kids and their drama with their friends. We made a “we won’t tell anyone what we talked about today” pact. I love that! I love my friend!

You need people! We all need people especially us ladies. We thrive on each other we process emotions by talking to each other and it helps us to not kill our husbands and children and for ourselves. Men need that sense of community to but they process things differently sorry guys but I don’t know how to tell you to do it, but grab a guy friend go shoot hoops or play golf, boys don’t seem to need to talk as much as ladies they need to move, work on cars together or play sports. Bottom line we all need community and friends. Ladies tend to compete with each other and get petty and find faults we need to stop that! I am thankful that this mom friend has never made me feel like we are competing, Nor has she judged me, she’s a good friend! Not to mention she has been available to take my kids to and from school and even take the boy at times and she doesn’t have boys. She is really a great gal pal and I love her and we all need more of them.

Go be with your community! Be friends with your spouse and Have a friend group to hang with and confide in together but also separate from your spouse. Being loved and being social is one thing that helps us thrive. We need connection sometimes we need to ask our friends over for coffee and stop waiting for them to call us!

#SLWC2018

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Plan Focus Give Grace

26 Sunday Feb 2017

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be Present, Cleaning, Connection, Family, Friends, Homemaker, Live in the Moment, Marriage is work, Organization, Parenting, Planning, Raising Kids, Schedule, Working Mom

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Faimily, Focus, Give grace!, give yourself grace, Grace, Life is Hard, Live, Love, Make a plan, stick to it

Hello Readers,

I have to confess, I have had a rough go lately. The Hubs and I have been struggling. It’s hard for me to write encouraging posts when I don’t feel so positive it is hard for me to write positive without feeling like a fake. So, with that said, I am feeling more positive, I know that I may be having some sort of depression or anxiety and need to pay attention and not get lost in it. I am going to be going back to counseling on my own and I will be checking in with my GP about some tummy issues I’ve been having, to keep my health a priority and take care of me. As a person, as a mom, as a wife and a health care provider it is hard to serve in your roll if you feel down and ineffective. Like they say it is impossible to serve from an empty vessel.

empty-vesselIn my life in the last week I have had some clarity of mind to realize I need to focus on me. Not in a selfish way where you are “more important” than your family, that you are charged with taking care of, but in a way to be the healthiest you so your family can have a healthy mom, healthy wife and your clients can have a healthy provider coming from a place of love and caring. I have been so bogged down with stress in life that I am complaining a lot, offended easily and my brain gets flooded and I get angry easily. So much so that I don’t really recognize myself and then when the hubs and I get into “special moments” I feel like I turn into some monster that is not me! Then it spirals out of control! So I am taking control of me. Part of that is me getting back into blogging here. I want to encourage people who are or have been in my spot. Also it helps me to get my feelings out and helps me to help guide myself in a positive way, not just my readers. Plus entertaining readers with my Hump Day Challenges is a passion of mine that I have missed the last few weeks.

Another part is getting back to my life. I have been working a lot and losing site of what really matters. My work matters but there is a balance that needs to be heeded. A balance of working in my business (doing massage) as well as working on my business (admin stuff like billing and marketing). I love networking for marketing and I have a lot of friends that I network with but that networking time needs to be just that and sometimes the balance of networking and socializing line blurs and loses potency.

So to deter the blurred lines of friend time and networking time I plan to be more active in my life with friends. We all struggle balance with work and fun but it is important to stay in touch with your “people”. You know, the ones who can figure out your drunk text typos and actually answer or support you in those moments! So one part of this gaining balance and getting back to me is scheduling girlfriend time as well as date nights and family nights! All three is important as important as work time.

Another part is planning house work time. This is harder for me because really, who wants to do the bull shit tasks of cooking, cleaning and grocery shopping? Especially after work and taxiing around the kids after a full day of work? But if you ignore it or don’t plan it you end up with those “special moments” with the Hubs that no one really wants! So this next sentence is very important, You must plan with your family! Everyone in the family has a responsibility  for how the house runs! The Hubs and I have had some conversations on this and although we haven’t really planned it all out, we have made huge gains in this area. The Hubs has started helping with dishes and putting laundry away. There is much to be said about a person who actually steps up to handle the things that they hate not being done versus just complaining about it! So: MAKE A FAMILY PLAN ABOUT HOW YOUR HOUSE WILL BE RAN AND EVERYONE CONTRIBUTE! Talk about it and follow through.

So to sum up this long post:

  1. Take care of you if that means going to the doctor, counselor, journaling, exercising, What ever it is, make time!! My plan get back to counseling, exercise everyday (at least cardio), get to doctor about tummy issues, have grace with myself when I am overwhelmed!
  2. Schedule and stick to it you work and admin time in your business! My plan just get it admin and massage time on the books and don’t waiver regardless of the client and their schedule, make my schedule and family time as important as theirs. Balance!
  3. Schedule Date nights, family nights and time with “your people” My plan: Schedule girlfriend time once a month, Date nights weekly and actually go, Family nights or outings weekly
  4. Schedule House work and responsibilities! Everyone has a responsibility to participate it is not all on mom regardless if mom is a working mom stay at home. We need to teach our kids they have to contribute as well as the husbands. Talk about it and make a plan! My Plan: schedule family menu planning meetings, utilize Clicklist with preplanned menus. Give kids chores and follow through with them to do it on schedule before practices and dance.
  5. GIVE GRACE! Let everyone have a little grace with heavy stress load times of homework, busy work days and heavily scheduled tournaments or competitions. Everyone is trying hard to motivate through life! We all want what’s best for our family and ourselves and sometimes we need to take a nap instead of vacuum! As long as we are all doing our best when our family needs help lets lend a helping hand they will do the same for you when you need! Help each other out to get to the goal and enjoy the good moments like the tournament wins and realize sometimes those things come when the house is messy, but when those moments are over and we have down time we can catch up when we need to! As long as there is not mold growing on the dishes and the house isn’t burning down and there is a dance to watch or a game going on…take it in! Enjoy these busy crazy moments building a lives, growing children into adults, growing a business and creating a life! Make it happy!!!

Live the life you’ve imagined because remember in your dreams you saw the results not the work that it takes to get there! FOCUS on what is important. Family, friends, lives, and moments are important! Money and dishes and laundry will go away savor moments with your people!!!

#Live2017

 

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23 Friday Dec 2016

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Friends, Live life

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Tags

Life is hard sometimes, miss my friend, Take care of you, this too shall pass, time heals all wounds

I have had a rough few weeks. Last week I lost a friend, as a result of the circumstances that are fucked up. I know my friend was not ending our friendship because of anything that I did wrong but because it was what was the healthiest decision, probably for both of us. It is still sad to see a friend walk out of your life for no reason except the shitty things happening around you. Sometimes in lifewe have no control over the circumstances or things that happen to is we only have control over how we respond and live life after shiftiness happens. So for that reason my friend and I we had to say goodbye! At least for now. It was shitty. It still is shitty. Life is hard sometimes. Not every decision feels good and not every decision is a right and wrong some are deciding between shitty and more shitty, but as in this situation sometimes shitty is the healthy decision!

A Poem I memorized in Jr High school is in my brain from Langston Hughes 

“I loved my friend he went away from me. The poem ends soft as it began I loved my friend.”

I hope to one day reunite but for now we have to take care of ourselves. I promised my friend I would take care of me and I plan to keep the promise. It’s time to be positive and live life.

#Friends2016

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Feeling “22”

22 Sunday May 2016

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Family, Friends

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After party, Friends, Fun, Love, Love my family

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Last night was 90’s night at our favorite bar. They did this last year as well and it was a blast. This year was fun too. I love hearing bands play songs from my teenage and young adult years! Brings back very fond memories. We met up with some friends and just let our hair down and relaxed. Our friends have a baby and they don’t get out much but we had a blast!

We acted and felt like we were “22” to quote TSwift. It was a bunch if fun I have a few bruises I don’t remember getting and I cut my foot in a broken bottle, but other than that no worse for the wear! I kind of need a Weekend to recover from this weekend, we went out Friday for just a reboot the two of us, the tonight we had a birthday celebration for another friend.

I so love these weekends. Fun times, no drama with great people…friends who are family. I needed this!

#Recomitt2016

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Never make “Down Time” plans!

11 Wednesday May 2016

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Baseball, Family, Friends, Hump Day Challenge, Just Do It, Sex

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Busy mom stuff

So it’s Wednesday a busy worn day and Jump Day Challenge Day. I haven’t wrote yet because at the end of base all practice the Boy took a pop fly to the cheek. We were in urgent care for X-rays and to get him checked out. I had been thinking about my Challenge for today but hadn’t created it yet. I  exhausted emotionally as well as physically. I just want to go to bed, but I need sex with the Hubs! Why does it feel like so much work when I am tired?

So today I am challenging you to have sex! Just fuck, I want to break out the sparkly butt plug but that might just have to wait until tomorrow or next week’s challenge. Just fuck your lover, enjoy relax show and feel the physical expression of you love for each other take care of and/or surprise him/her with appreciation and give a little oral too just for good measure!

Good night!
#recommit2016

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Happy Friday Dance

01 Friday Apr 2016

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be You, Connection, Friends, Love, Mom Stuff, Self Care

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Happy Friday, sleepy husband, Tribe, Wake up and Goodnight sex, Women need a tribe

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I miss my ladies that I used to hang with in Fridays. We used to sing and dance and talk while our husband’s played pool and watched. It was my woman tribe! I miss them! Need to find some new peeps and start a new tribe!

In the mean time I am not going to met the Hubs just crash on the couch! Going to wake him up before we go to sleep…if you know what I mean *Wink wink*

Happy Friday folks!

#Recommit2016

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Donate Life

20 Sunday Mar 2016

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Family, Friends

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#WeAre23, Donate Life, You can't take it with you

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We have a very close friend who has had juvenile diabetes since he was young. He has needed a pancreas and kidney transplant for a while. He got the call Friday that there was a donor went in Saturday and had the 6-8 hour surgery. This after many false alarms where he got the call on my to find out the organs were not good enough. As of this morning his new pancreas was already making insulin. Then this evening they had to give him insulin and checked his heart due to low blood pressure. I am so worried but so hopeful and thankful.

Our friend is so close to not being able to live a full life. Then someone who’s life ended to soon saved our friend. I cannot even express how thankful I am and so many of our friends are. This whole community is thankful. This friend is a coach to so many children in this community. He is a teacher and means so much to so many. I can’t even imagine…

I am just so thankful. If you are not yet, register to be an organ donor. So many possibilities you could help someone else and their families of you as they say “recycle your body”

#Recommit2016

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Four Posts Plus

12 Saturday Mar 2016

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be You, Friends, Live in the Moment, Lock your door!, Relax, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

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Bondage, Helping Out, Over sharing is okay here, Sex, Tied Up, Weekend away

Good morning!!! We are sitting here at the B&B in our room enjoying the view and snow on the ground. I am lounging on the bed watching the fire. This bed is really cool! It is a 4 post bed, wish we would have brought the bondage kit, there are a lot of places and ways to tie one up with this. I did bring one scarf…might have to buy a new one in town.

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My view from where I sit in my room.

I am excited to have a weekend away. I have already opened up my mind in my writing again. Funny thing, a friend sent a message to me yesterday asking of a hotel with a Jacuzzi tub. She said they just wanted to get away for the night. Apparently they have been doing a lot of Love and Washing Clothes but needed some privacy and spark for Sex. She later sent “It’s nice I can ask you random questions and know you won’t judge.” Obviously, I don’t judge, ever. You go get it girl, I am happy for you. Good sex of any kind is great for relationships and marriages!

What’s funny is (no it’s kind of sad) in my real life sometimes I am a bit shy. Not prudish at all but I am definitely more comfortable behind the keyboard than in real life. The Hubs doesn’t get that. I am afraid of people judging me! I worry sometimes being a massage therapist and mom what people would say of they knew I was talking openly about sex and Anal play and toys ect. But then I realize that is a very prudish and judgemental mindset and if they want to judge me like that, Fuck them! If I was distributing sex advice to teenagers or children or mailing out pamphlets that would be different. I am trying to support adult relationships here. Good sex can save your marriage!

There are so many reason to relax and enjoy sex! There is no reason to be ashamed and there are so many reasons to get more suggestions advice and help. Let’s face it, you’re not talking about lube or sharing exciting stories of experiences for suggestions of new positions when your watching your kid’s baseball game! So you read Sex Love and Washing Clothes, I share and give suggestions and you can also read some comments from other readers and we all can learn and get more comfortable and confident in our sex life!!

#Recommit2016

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Motivation, Get Some!

21 Thursday Jan 2016

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Do You, Friends, Love your body, Self Care, Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

accountability, LIfestyle changes, Love you, Motivational quotes, Take care of you, teammates, Weight loss

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Many of you readers know I am a chronic dieter. Or not really a dieter but I am constantly watching my weight and I am in these weight loss challenge groups. Every 12 weeks or so me and about 40 other people are in this weight loss challenge, we put in $25 each and the top 3 get the money. It is a good way to get support and challenge each other. This challenge to change it up we are in teams of 2. My teammate I have never met. She and I have texted and for the last few weeks became each other’s cheer leader. Each week in the challenge we have mini challenges this week part of our mini challenge was to create something specifically to motivate out teammate. a couple of my friends are teammates with the mom or husband or BFF but me I don’t know my gal and I want to be extra motivational but don’t really know her. So I just pulled out some Quote pictures and made a little collage. I also wrote to her stating how thankful I am to have her to be accountable to. I am not always very self accountable. The most self accountability I have ever had has been writing this blog everyday. But when it comes to turning down the chocolate sittong on the counter at work or ice cream I usually make an excuse that I can have just one. Then I have just one more and one more until it turns into “Fuck It! I will be better tomorrow!” As I proceed to eat the whol bag of goodies! But for some reason when my success affects my teammate I tend to be a bit more driven to turn down that chocolate. Why is it that we can give up on ourselves so easily but it is harder to give up on someone else.

At least that’s how I am. I suck at getting to aerobics classes as a student but when I taught, I was always there! I love exercise classes, I would love to teach again too but for some reason I will constantly make excuses. I deserve a self to be better and to take care of me better. But at least for now I have a teammate who will benefit or not from my success which makes me more motivated to say no thank you when the daughter offers to get me ice cream after a long day. Now is a good time to be curious about that and maybe try to refocus my head to better take care of me. You know I preach self care all the time!!!!

So here is the motivational quotes I included in said collage. I found some that really spoke to me. I am hoping these quotes will speak to and inspire my teammate as well. My bet is she needed these quotes as much as I did. We have been a good fit for each other it is amazing how the universe works getting people together some how…almost like it was planned. Whatever it is divine intervention is awesome and I can’t wait to see where my teammate and I are heading in our weight loss/life battles.

To Self Care and Accountability

#Everyday2016

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Look Up It’s Game Day! Go Hawks!!

15 Sunday Nov 2015

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in #GoHawks, Be Present, Connection, Family, Football, Friends, Heads Up Football, Kids, Seahawks

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Bummer I forgot a day!!, End of Season Sadness, Football, Friends, Fun, No Cell Phones, Party, Seahawks

Damn it!!! I go into living and being in the moment yesterday that I didn’t blog. I had planned on doing it between or maybe during the Boy’s football end of season party. Which almost was a disaster because the Mini Helmets that we give out (instead of trophies) were slow in shipping so they were not going to be delivered until Monday! I tracked them down and drove to DuPont, which is about an hour away, to get them. We set up the ‘trophy’ table with personalized cookies that I had made for everyone with the Helmets. It looked so cute and the party was a blast. Kids had fun coaches and parents bonded some more before departing for the off season! I love football season! Can’t wait for next year!

After the party we met up with some of our besties, and my phone died so even if I hadn’t “forgotten” I wouldn’t have been able to blog anyway! But you know it was nice to not have my phone or as the Hubs calls it my leash! I have been trying over the last year or so to not be so attached to my phone (except when I am blogging on the way to a Hawks game like today).

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It is actually nice. Who cares what’s going on on Facebook or Twitter or in the News while you are spending quality time with friends! It is kind of annoying when you’re with your buddies and they have to check Facebook to see what everyone else is doing. A quick selfie post to social media is cool but why do we care what all your friends that you’re not hanging with are doing? When we are together let’s be together. Our group last night were good with this for the most part. Everyone has one in the group that gets attached to their phone and really we are all the one friend every now and then. When you notice you turn into that person leave your phone in the car or something to get you to check in with the real people you are with. (You can finish reading my blog first though!)

I love my friends. The best part about them is that we don’t see eachother as much as we used to but we still love each other and have as much fun as always even when we add a new person like yesterday! It was fun we danced and sang and bonded and plain just relaxed. Most phones stayed in pockets we didn’t even take selfies we just were together, laughed and enjoyed each others company!

Now today is Seahawks Day!!!

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It’s a night game but the Hubs and I are going over early and going to enjoy the day together! It’s our day and since I’ve been working during away games we really like to take it in and enjoy the day with each other and no other responsibilities!

Enjoy your day Friends! Look up from your phone and enjoy life in the real world! You can catch up on Facebook later!

#Everyday2015

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