There are decisions we face daily that affect our lives in bigger ways than we know. Sometimes you make the best decision other times they are not so good. I am refraining away from saying right and wrong. We don’t always know what is right and what is wrong. I think more often than not there is no right and there is no wrong. There is always better or worse decisions or things you could have done. I guess there are somethings that are “right” and/or “wrong” but not everyone defines those things the same so it is up to interpretation in certain situations.
Have you ever had a situation in your life that you feel like keeps repeating itself? When you realize it is about decisions you are making (or not making) in life, then what do you do? How do you respond differently to people and get them to believe you when you decide to go a different way this time? You have always been a certain way and now your friends are sitting there going “What the FUCK? She’s never meant that before!” How do you get them to believe you? What makes you make the decision to separate the old you and the new you? I have read about people recovering from addiction struggling with this. Their old friends want them to be the same way they always have been but a sober person is not always the same when you are used to a drunk or high person. Friends no longer know how to handle you and you no longer know how to handle them. It puts you in a little pickle. An uncomfortable spot that you don’t know how to act differently and the old you would just go grab a beer and move forward but you are now trying to not grab that beer. You miss your friends and your people you know you want to be different but how can you? How do you live one way and change midstream?
I do not have that answer! I wish I did because right now I am faced with a similar situation. My “addiction” however is the addiction to taking the path of least resistance. That is not always the right path or the best path! In reality it is usually much the opposite! I have in my life tried to do what is “right” or best in my life but I think, in some situations, I have chosen what was easy. Not all decisions and sometimes, most times I have come out on the other side to finally make the decision that was right after putting up with negativity, and bull shit for too long! I have self sacrificed my sanity and happiness sometimes in my work and my business and sometimes in my relationship and as a mom and volunteer. I have not always been the best at getting the best for myself. Well, that’s about to change, it needs to change. The hardest part of that is knowing what is the best. Separating what is best from what you really want or what is easy and convenient. How do you know if it’s what you SHOULD do or if it’s what you WANT to do? Some things are easy like you shouldn’t eat a whole chocolate cake when you feel bad about yourself, but others hard, like deciding weather to buy the perfect house in the wrong location or the perfect location with the wrong house. Neither is really wrong one is best in one category and the other is the best in the other category and only you can decide which category is most important!
This blog post is not about giving advice or an answer for this. NOPE! It takes you knowing yourself, truly knowing yourself. Being able to decipher the right decision takes you getting right with no one else but you! If you are anything like me that is the toughest thing you will do on this planet. I can have it all figured out in my head when I out on a run (that is when I solve world problems) or when I am by myself but then when faced with it in real life I choke. I struggle knowing the difference between what I want and/or need and what I think I am supposed to want and/or need. The beauty in most things in life is you can change your mind, you can always change your direction. It is hard, but Possible. I must also mention making life decisions when you are a parent is, it affects your kids not just you. My goal in life is to give my kids the best life has to offer. To grow them in a happy environment with little need for therapy when they become adults. I can change my mind and make my life better at any moment but does that harm them? That’s what muddies the water of making the best decision for me. I truly believe the best decision for you, is also the best decision for your children regardless.So really that shouldn’t (there I go should-ing again) affect your personal decision.
The best decision for you IS the best decision for you. Have faith in yourself (there I go giving advice, advice I don’t take very well myself) take time in making decisions but always know as hard as it is to make the decision there are not many that you can’t go back and change. However, I personally, would prefer to do it right the first time! Time heals all, right? Time is the piece I always forget when I am faced with decisions that are hard, it takes time. I will give myself time, this time. I will follow through and I will make the best decision based on everything, not just how I feel right now, five days ago, last night or tomorrow night but based on what I think after some time has passed and WHEN I KNOW it is the best/right decision for me. They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. I am usually forced to make decisions in the right now, how do we create change now?! Well, this time I am going to wait and try it and see what will happen before I decide. I’ve got this, I am sure if you are reading this it will resonate with you and you will do the same. So here is to us creating change in our lives by giving it time. Time to decide and having faith in ourselves, knowing what is right when we know what is right and then doing it. We will do what is right, not what is easy but what is hard. It is what is BEST!