Category Archives: Live life

Change is Coming

14 Sunday Jan 2018

Posted by in #GoHawks, Be Present, Family, Football, Live in the Moment, Live life, Planning, Seahawks

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Today we are sitting watching NFL football and reminiscing about our Football team, the Seahawks. It’s been a few years since we haven’t been at a playoff game or had a game to watch during the playoffs. It’s great to be a good team but it takes constant work and effort and dynamic adjustments on many levels. Football is the ultimate team sport. The team has to work together as whole in order to win games and even more work to stay on top.

Football is dynamic in the game and even in-between seasons. Our team, the Seahawks, have seen so many changes. We’ve seen a lot stay the same as well. But if things that are dynamic and things that are static don’t groove together, you struggle. That is what happened this season. This is also what happens over time with relationships and families as well.

So many things are static but yet so many things are dynamic in life. It’s great if your loving the things that don’t change but if you are one who wants to embrace the dynamics of change and live with one who does not it can cause difficulty and struggle. The key is balance in life and football. There will always be change and there will always be things that stay the same. You cannot always affect them, be it to change or keep them the way you want.

We must, in order to be happy, embrace it all. Look for the things you love in every situation. Savor the passing moment as you are not guaranteed to have it again as much as you wish or want to or even try to keep it you will never get it back. It’s always good to remember what works, but realize you may not be able to duplicate it and that is okay. Change is really the only constant in life and change is not constant.

Acceptance, love, appreciation for the good is what we need to focus regardless of it’s what we think we want or need. Search for the good focus on the good enhance the good and put in hard work to affect change in the way you want it to go. If you don’t get the results you want, change is coming so don’t let it get you down!

Here’s to a better you, a better family, and a better football season, in 2018. It will take to perseverance to sustain and faith to change what needs to change.

#GoHawks

#SLWC2018

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23 Friday Dec 2016

Posted by in Friends, Live life

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I have had a rough few weeks. Last week I lost a friend, as a result of the circumstances that are fucked up. I know my friend was not ending our friendship because of anything that I did wrong but because it was what was the healthiest decision, probably for both of us. It is still sad to see a friend walk out of your life for no reason except the shitty things happening around you. Sometimes in lifewe have no control over the circumstances or things that happen to is we only have control over how we respond and live life after shiftiness happens. So for that reason my friend and I we had to say goodbye! At least for now. It was shitty. It still is shitty. Life is hard sometimes. Not every decision feels good and not every decision is a right and wrong some are deciding between shitty and more shitty, but as in this situation sometimes shitty is the healthy decision!

A Poem I memorized in Jr High school is in my brain from Langston Hughes 

“I loved my friend he went away from me. The poem ends soft as it began I loved my friend.”

I hope to one day reunite but for now we have to take care of ourselves. I promised my friend I would take care of me and I plan to keep the promise. It’s time to be positive and live life.

#Friends2016

Rise Above the Negative

21 Monday Nov 2016

Posted by in Be Present, Be You, Family, Live life, Marriage is work, Mom Stuff, Raising Kids, Self Care, Working Mom

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Hello friends! Last week was rough for me! I am rising above the negativity and coming out of those ashes! I know that we mom’s expect much more out of ourselves than we should. Many times, we expect even more from ourselves than our worst critic. Sadly, sometimes, that critic lives with us and is one that we love most and the one we don’t want to let down. Which is why we are so hard on ourselves. Little does that critic know he or she, his criticism, is what not only drives us and motivates us to do better but also and more likely is what drives us to fall into dark places, kills us on the inside and shakes our confidence. 

So this quick post is to say to you, rise above you mom or sister or whoever is hard on you, magnifying you minor faults, most of all rise above that voice in your head shouting out your major faults! It’s time to realize, we are all worthy of the crown we wear! Yes we all wear a crown! We are all queens of our own universe and we are our best ally! So stop cutting youself short, stop focusing on the negative don’t letting them in your head! Don’t believe everything you think! You are not that bad you are the queen

Try to find a way to shake off their words and negativity and find positive. Call your friend who supports you. Go chat with you brother or dad instead of your unapproving mother. Have girlfriend time (or guy time if your a dude reading this post). Distract yourself away from the negative. Whoever that critical family member is trying to help you be better. But you can’t hear that it’s best to get away to distract yourself away from the negative situation. Read mom blogs like this one to remind yourself that you are normal! We are all normal and we are all queens! Our crowns do t always have jewels sometimes the have gray hair or as a friend of mine states Sparkly hair and sometimes it’s a ponytail thrown up.in a baseball cap! Wear it proud. 

This critical loved one, they have a dark story and tjays where their negativity is coming from there. They probably need support and positivity in their life as well but you focus on you. They are not ready to focus on themselves maybe they don’t know how. Let them be. Share only love that is the only way to break the cycle, get yourself the loving support that you need and love your loved ones back. Break the cycle of negativity and Rise above!

You don’t have an alien living in your house, you doing just fine! You are the queen, keep it up! 

#Rise2016

Dance Rescues Life

27 Tuesday Sep 2016

Posted by in Be Present, Be You, Dance Like No One is Watching, Do Your Thing, Live in the Moment, Live life, Love, Marriage is hard

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​***writers note I started this yesterday, Monday edited and completed Tuesday**

What a great three day weekend (we played hookie today so we all had a three day weekend) To be honest, it was a rough start to our weekend. The Hubs and I had a long “Special Moment” (aka big fight) to start off Saturday then a loss for our PeeWee team made it just a bad day but then was recovered with great friends who are more like family Saturday night. Then it was Seahawks Sunday then we ran into more good friends after the game and then we met up at Great Wolf Lodge Monday with the kids and In-laws. However, I feel shafted because the power went out and we didn’t get that much time in the water park, and then home to a crazy mess of a house. Then, I realized the meat in the fridge that needed to be cooked or thrown away, only $130+ so I had to throw it on the Traeger to salvage it dinners are pre-prepped for the week …I guess. Then it was time for my Adult Modern Dance Class. I was tired and unmotivated, but I knew it would lift me up and rescue the day (not that it was bad, but I was tired). 

In Modern, We are working on improving and “feeling” the music without “holding back” or judging our moves. Take up the space, use the floor and dance from within….I SO NEEDED that!!!! I need that in my whole life. Dance overflows totally into life, Thanks Ms X! Dance once again rescued my day and actually without getting to in depth dance really has rescued my life more than once! And then today, flowers from the Hubs to seal the weekend. And better yet we go back to work/school for Tuesday, it won’t be a Monday! 

So, Love life! Embrace the positive, ditch the negative. Dance from within. I think dance is the only time in my life maybe the only time I allow myself to be uncensored (when I close my eyes, yes I dance improv with my eyes closed so I don’t judge myself). I am thankful for dance and a class to go to and a teacher who draws out my soul out to put it in my dance. I may one day find if it is ever possible, I may find the real me, with the help of dance probably on stage when I don’t even expect it! I love dance! Dance mimics life and I love dance, my life is a dance. I love my life!

#Dance2016

Put Energy In Things That Move You Closer To Your Goals

21 Sunday Aug 2016

Posted by in Be You, Business, Do Your Thing, Live in the Moment, Live life, Planning, Working Mom

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Stress-management-photoI really miss blogging everyday. I really hope to get back to it. However, I really want my blog to be quality. To be inspirational, educational, funny and have less typos. However, when I write many times I am distracted and have a lot going on. That’s what happens as a working mom. I lack good boundaries to set strict rules for myself and my family about when they can get my attention and when I put my attention into different things than just my blog. I have started a business and that has taken a lot more energy and effort and my time than I originally had planned for. I know it is going to be great but it needs a lot of energy and I have to make it a priority. I should make a priority to set a better schedule and get all of my tasks in. Sometimes, I just sit and do nothing or watch mindless TV shows to just relax. Everyone needs that, yes, everyone does!

I am working to help you my readers to be better at being present in your life. That is a goal I have to inspire you and encourage you and myself to be present. Whatever it is that you are trying to do do it big, do it well and do it with love! I am not the best example of how to do that, but I know you can do it. Do your best, love with all your heart. Have perspective and put your energy in the areas of your life that you want to flourish! A good place to start with that is to have a schedule, make lists, prioritize well and get help!

One big thing you need, this deserves it’s own paragraph is self awareness. Know what you want. Have a vision and be clear. Write it down if you need to. When you are feeling overwhelmed take a minute to step back and evaluate where you are and where you want to be. Are you on a path that is getting you closer to where you want to be or are you putting too much energy into things or places that don’t matter! Really be intentional in everything you do and you will get closer to where you want to go. Eliminate things that don’t help you get there. Those moments you say “yes” when you know you should say “no” take a minute and think, will this help me in the areas of my life I need to keep moving forward? Will this help accomplish my goals? If not then respectfully say “no”. There are sometimes we do have to sacrifice for our children or our spouse or family and do those things  but make it meaningful. If you cannot do it full out and with a good spirit say no anyway! Always do everything with your best energy and intention. You will be rewarded for that, in some way shape or form. I believe that to be so.

I will work on this as I muddle through this first month of owning my own business. I will work through getting myself organized, scheduling things in my life so I can not be buried in my business but also not make my business a charity and make money and pay myself with it. I will work on all of this. I will make lists, schedule groceries and cleaning. I already have put on my schedule my “business accounting/billing/office work” time for Tuesday mornings. Grocery shopping is after that and cleaning will need a time too. I will be working Monday and Friday evenings and probably Tuesdays as well, I haven’t got that nailed down as I have an onsite job that I do and I need to make sure that day is nailed down first. I will commit to continuing to write a Hump Day Challenge every week and I will try to include at least two more posts every week. So you should see at least three blog posts a week from me, sometimes more when I have a moment.

So there you have it. There is the start to my list and my commitment to you readers. I love this blog, I love writing. I love my family and husband and kids and my business. I have to give myself some realistic expectations of how to accomplish happiness and balance. Keep reading and feel free to comment and interact with me if you like. Continue to be positive and open minded and keep having sex as much as you can! Go forth and Sex, Love and Washing Clothes with me!

#Plan2016

Reminiscing

12 Sunday Jun 2016

Posted by in Be Present, Be You, Do You, Do Your Thing, Live life, Love

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The Girl danced in her 10th spring recital this weekend. The boy’s baseball team took 2nd in their tournament this weekend and at the end of this previous week we celebrated 16 years living in our home that we puchased and 18 years of the Hubs working in the elevator industry. But, we are the young couple who met in Washington State History class in high school.

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Life goes quick. It is too fast to not live it to the fullest and to short stay in a spot that you are unhappy! It is too short to worry what other people think! Not enough time to hold back and not try new things. Too short to follow certain rules that some older person set out for you! Stop worrying what other people think. If it feels good, do it. If it makes you smile, it’s okay. If you need that stimulation go ahead and get it. Do what makes you tick. Fuck them all who will judge you!

Do you. Be you. Love who you are. Know what you love. Do what you love. Do what makes you happy. If someone tells you THAT is wrong, fuck them too! Be happy, be content! Don’t put yourself down. Do your best always. If your best comes up short, honor your effort and keep trying!

No one can do you better than you!

#Recommit2016

Don’t Be Afraid

16 Monday May 2016

Posted by in Be You, Business, Do You, Don't judge me, Live in the Moment, Live life, Marriage is work, Mom Stuff, Raising Kids, Running, Schedule, Self Care, Take the time to take care of yourself, Volunteering, Working Mom

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I have gotten away from posting and/or writing everyday. I miss it! I want to write more but I am so busy, and other things get in the way. I want to take care of myself better too and the same things get in the way! It is my time! I am Ruby, I am a Mom, I am a Wife, I am a Massage Therapist and many other things. I am a woman who deserves the best from herself and I have not been giving myself the best. It is scary to leave what works and go to the unknown. I know I am better than this, I know I deserve better. I even think I know how to get it. But I am scared and as with every part of my life so far I sabotage and make excuses! STOP IT RUBY! JUST, STOP IT!

Don't be afraidI am a dreamer I believe we all deserve the best and we all are worthy but for some reason I accept less, always. Especially when it is me that is responsible for making it happen. It is so easy to stay in the now especially when things are good enough and maybe even better than most. I still sit here wanting the best, wanting more am I really capable? How can I do it? Will it really work? If not then what? Will I lose everything I have worked for so far? Probably not, but possibly. That is always possible. Am I making the best effort all the time? am I always doing my best? Am I always expecting the best or am I always accepting less? I am always accepting less, for me, I can sacrifice. As long as everyone else is happy. My best happiness does not always matter to me. I want everyone else to be happy I want them to have it easy, I will do the harder work to make you happy and hope that you will do the same for me…guess what, they don’t!

So here is my charge to myself, it is time to make the best decision for me. It is time for me to go be great! I know what I have to do. I almost know how to do it. I don’t know how I am going to but I am going to do it! I will be great. My life will be great and I will get what I deserve. I will not shy away from work to get there!

Do you need to do the same? Let’s support each other!

#DoYou2016

Turning Heads

07 Thursday Apr 2016

Posted by in Live life, Love

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Was sitting in my new car (Pearl) while the Hubs was pumping gas. This guy drove by staring I was getting concerned he was the second car to drive by slowly looking my direction. I was thinking WTF people?!

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Then I realized they were checking out my car! It was a pretty cool feeling to have the car that makes people turn and look. Not that it means anything but it makes me feel proud of myself and our family.

The Hubs and I have worked hard to be able to afford our life the way we want it and the way we live it. We were talking tonight about how we hope this resonates with the kids. That they will see that we work hard to have a comfortable life. We planned ahead, we saved and worked hard, we waited for the right time to buy this car. We have always lived within our means and can still put away for retirement. We have been and will continue to plan well enough to be financially secure. That’s one reason we took so long to purchase this car and why we don’t live in a giant house on the lake, yet, and why our kids don’t get the newest coolest toys every time they ask and why we don’t buy swag everywhere we go when we go to events and such.

One day we will get that house on the lake but we will do it right. We will be patient and not over extend our selves. It is fun to have nice things that make people turn their heads but it is more fun to be able to enjoy the life you have. Love the life you live and live the life you love. It takes time and planning and skill to get to the place we are at, it doesn’t happen by accident and it is accessible to everyone. It just takes work!

Put in the work!

#Recommit2016

Not So Perfect Lake House

26 Saturday Mar 2016

Posted by in Family, Live life

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So today we went to look at the lake house I’ve been day dreaming about. I absolutely loved the house especially the kitchen was AMAZING! I really like it. However, it not our dream home. The Hubs is very particular and like specific things done specific ways. The house had Vinyl siding which was a draw back for him. There were also a few others, the garage door was only a 10 foot door, the end of the lake that the house is on has Lilly pads so you couldn’t even get a boat to your dock with out having to flush the engine a lot or risk getting weeds in your prop.

All in all I am glad we went to see it. I am sad it was not perfect for us. I am glad that we now know and I can stop daydreaming (yeah right) about where the kids will go to school next year and having a lake party this summer! It also gives us a chance to get our house in order. We really need to do some stuff to our house. We have our bathroom to finish, some issues with the exterior of the front of the house by the chimney out front.

Looking at a new house helps you realize the things you have that you like and the things you can do differently at your house. The Hubs and I sat on the front step of our house today trying to decide what to do with our yard. We have some curb appeal type upgrades to do. We are waiting to meet with our friend about the bathroom and then the chimney and front of the house project.  Then maybe refinance if there is not another lake house that catches our eye. Or should I say “My” eye.

We will stay content for now in our happy first home! Until we find a “perfect” reason to up and move or are really ready to go somewhere else! This way we can enjoy our date nights and dinners out. I can hire a house cleaner and not feel scared that it too much money to spend. Here’s to living life and not wishing it away! Love the life you live.

#Recommit2016

New Years Eve 2015

31 Thursday Dec 2015

Posted by in #Everyday2015, Be You, Just Do It, Live life, Love, Sex Love and Washing Clothes, Uncategorized

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Well we made it through 2015. I received sad news yesterday that a Dance Dad and friend passed away yesterday so when I wrote “we made it through” I felt something morbid or said or guilty that we made it and not everyone in that family did. While we are all planning our events of how we are going to bring in the new year that particular family is probably planning a memorial of how they will remember their father and husband’s life. He was a great guy and will be missed. I don’t believe he would approve of any of us morning or slowing down our celebrations or joy because of him. He probably would love it if we could take “good photos” of all of it! He was what my children lovingly referred to as our own paparazzi. He will be missed. This is a good reminder for me to not live in sadness and to live life to it’s fullest. Not everyday is guaranteed.

Dr-Seuss-Youer-QuoteSo for a bit of a review of 2015. Last year I had decided to Have sex, wash clothes/clean house every day. I was sure it would help my relationship, and house organization skills ect. Well I blogged everyday. I had sex most days but I am not certain that it made my relationship better. I think my relationship is better today than a year ago but we still have rough times. I think sometimes the pressure of sex everyday put a lot of pressure to make sex a great big thing and one or the other of us expected more than what we got. So that caused some tension. However we learned that being intimate, loving each other happens in many ways. Great sex is a good part of a good relationship but you don’t have to have it everyday. Sometimes just a snuggle or blow job is fine….

As for the “Washing Clothes” part, yeah that was going to be the stretch for me. When I started I was a stay at home mom trying to figure out how to ‘schedule’ my ‘unscheduled’ days. I was doing well until that week of bartending school. Since then it has been chasing clothes and picking them out the laundry baskets. The kids did great picking up chores over the summer and I hired a house keeper to come in every two weeks but was not pleased with her work and stopped having her come a few weeks ago and now I am needing to get a new house cleaning service, but haven’t had time to interview one. However, I feel my in-between house cleaner visits, my keeping up with it work is shining! Last time my Gma June Cleaver was here, she complimented how well I had been doing! Made me feel good (even though it was the day after house cleaner day) it is a process of constant work folks there’s no way around it. You just have to do it! (Bluh!!)

So I love to blog, I love my family, I love my life! I excel in the Love piece of this trinity! I want to keep doing it. I may not do it everyday in 2016 but I haven’t decided yet. I’ve thought of many scenarios including doing 3 a week one sex blog, one love blog and one washing clothes blog. But that may be too much structure for me. I may just blog on weekdays or when I feel so lead. I don’t know I want to try to keep them long enough to be enjoyed but short enough to give readers a chance to read in one trip to the bathroom or a bus ride or something. This post is reaching that “too long to read” limit but I have so much more to say!

You all have learned a lot about me this year. Maybe too much TMI but I have really enjoyed being free to write and put my thoughts out there and I am also pleased to say I never wrote anything I had to remove, or felt regretful about. There was one day I blogged angry, the hubs said he hated my post that day I said I know you do. and I gave him the option to write a “rebuttle but he declined) and the next day I posted about “making up” and how I felt I maybe shouldn’t have blogged so angry and may have painted the Hubs side in a bad light. I got a few likes on the I may have been wrong post vs the angry rant I made got zero …I see who side you are all on! Just kidding, it’s not about taking sides in life. I wanted to be real and that was real and so was the next day about making up you fight and you make up it is all part of life! It is about living free. So here are some last thoughts and lessons from 2015, okay maybe some advice:

  • Live Free
  • don’t get offended if someone “takes the other side” (they probably have not
  • Don’t feel like you have to pick a side.
  • Love with reckless abandon!
  • Have crazy sex just for fun …as much as you want
  • Have romantic sex aka Make Love …as much as you want
  • Don’t be afraid to try something new, in life, love or in bed
  • Be the lover you want, and the one your lover wants
  • Love the lover you have, be with the one you love
  • Push through the hard times they are temporary
  • Have sex more!
  • Love more!
  • Wash clothes more
  • Be You
  • Love yourself
  • Don’t judge

Okay that list was long so I cut myself off. It’s funny how some things on that list although different are much the same! I have loved this year blogging! I am loving being a working mom but still hate labels! Every mom is a working mom some just work outside the home as well! I don’t have my 2016 plan yet but I will keep blogging and keep Sex Love and Washing Clothes-ing! I am feeling the “Sweet 16” will need to be part of my plan or goal or resolutions for the year. So have fun tonight. Be safe and cheers to a Sweet 2016! May you live life to the fullest have no regrets and be the best you that you can be!

Maybe 2016 will be a publishing year?????

And for the last time, bitter sweetly,

#Everyday2015