Tag Archives: Be You

Dance Rescues Life

27 Tuesday Sep 2016

Posted by in Be Present, Be You, Dance Like No One is Watching, Do Your Thing, Live in the Moment, Live life, Love, Marriage is hard

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​***writers note I started this yesterday, Monday edited and completed Tuesday**

What a great three day weekend (we played hookie today so we all had a three day weekend) To be honest, it was a rough start to our weekend. The Hubs and I had a long “Special Moment” (aka big fight) to start off Saturday then a loss for our PeeWee team made it just a bad day but then was recovered with great friends who are more like family Saturday night. Then it was Seahawks Sunday then we ran into more good friends after the game and then we met up at Great Wolf Lodge Monday with the kids and In-laws. However, I feel shafted because the power went out and we didn’t get that much time in the water park, and then home to a crazy mess of a house. Then, I realized the meat in the fridge that needed to be cooked or thrown away, only $130+ so I had to throw it on the Traeger to salvage it dinners are pre-prepped for the week …I guess. Then it was time for my Adult Modern Dance Class. I was tired and unmotivated, but I knew it would lift me up and rescue the day (not that it was bad, but I was tired). 

In Modern, We are working on improving and “feeling” the music without “holding back” or judging our moves. Take up the space, use the floor and dance from within….I SO NEEDED that!!!! I need that in my whole life. Dance overflows totally into life, Thanks Ms X! Dance once again rescued my day and actually without getting to in depth dance really has rescued my life more than once! And then today, flowers from the Hubs to seal the weekend. And better yet we go back to work/school for Tuesday, it won’t be a Monday! 

So, Love life! Embrace the positive, ditch the negative. Dance from within. I think dance is the only time in my life maybe the only time I allow myself to be uncensored (when I close my eyes, yes I dance improv with my eyes closed so I don’t judge myself). I am thankful for dance and a class to go to and a teacher who draws out my soul out to put it in my dance. I may one day find if it is ever possible, I may find the real me, with the help of dance probably on stage when I don’t even expect it! I love dance! Dance mimics life and I love dance, my life is a dance. I love my life!

#Dance2016

Reminiscing

12 Sunday Jun 2016

Posted by in Be Present, Be You, Do You, Do Your Thing, Live life, Love

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The Girl danced in her 10th spring recital this weekend. The boy’s baseball team took 2nd in their tournament this weekend and at the end of this previous week we celebrated 16 years living in our home that we puchased and 18 years of the Hubs working in the elevator industry. But, we are the young couple who met in Washington State History class in high school.

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Life goes quick. It is too fast to not live it to the fullest and to short stay in a spot that you are unhappy! It is too short to worry what other people think! Not enough time to hold back and not try new things. Too short to follow certain rules that some older person set out for you! Stop worrying what other people think. If it feels good, do it. If it makes you smile, it’s okay. If you need that stimulation go ahead and get it. Do what makes you tick. Fuck them all who will judge you!

Do you. Be you. Love who you are. Know what you love. Do what you love. Do what makes you happy. If someone tells you THAT is wrong, fuck them too! Be happy, be content! Don’t put yourself down. Do your best always. If your best comes up short, honor your effort and keep trying!

No one can do you better than you!

#Recommit2016

Meditate on This

17 Tuesday May 2016

Posted by in Be Present, Be You

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I’m getting my hair done. Sitting in the salon chair “processing”. That’s a big word for letting the color solution change the color of my hair. I am also processing some events of the last few days and some future plans. As I “process” I sit here with hair dryers in the background, and an undertone of conversation there is definitely more to process than my hair!

I have a lot going on right now, between work, kids, husband, life in general. It would be nice to have a day, or just a few hours even, to “process” everything. In real life though you don’t get time to stop and process. But what if we did? Some cultures in Asia they, at least they used to, take time and plan time I to their day to meditate..aka process life.  I have done some meditation and honestky it is as needed in our “American Culture” as much as exercise. I process a lot of my emotions by exercising, chatting with girlfriends and eating chocolate cake but really nothing replaces just standing and breathing in where you are as just being…that’s what meditation really is.

So here is my charge to you: Meditate on where you are, what you are and/or who you are. Turn off the background noise and check in to you! What is not that you need? what is it that you need to know? about you? about how you feel? about who you are?

Basically, where do you stand? Not, where do you think you ‘should’ stand…”where do you stand?”

Once you answer that question, processing may be slightly easier….

#Recommit2016

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17 Tuesday May 2016

Posted by in Be Present, Be You

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I’m getting my hair done. Sitting in the salon chair “processing”. That’s a big word for letting the color solution change the color of my hair. I am also processing some events of the last few days and some future plans. As I “process” I sit here with hair dryers in the background, and an undertone of conversation there is definitely more to process than my hair!

I have a lot going on right now, between work, kids, husband, life in general. It would be nice to have a day, or just a few hours even, to “process” everything. In real life though you don’t get time to stop and process. But what if we did? Some cultures in Asia they, at least they used to, take time and plan time I to their day to meditate..aka process life.  I have done some meditation and honestky it is as needed in our “American Culture” as much as exercise. I process a lot of my emotions by exercising, chatting with girlfriends and eating chocolate cake but really nothing replaces just standing and breathing in where you are as just being…that’s what meditation really is.

So here is my charge to you: Meditate on where you are, what you are and/or who you are. Turn off the background noise and check in to you! What is not that you need? what is it that you need to know? about you? about how you feel? about who you are?

Basically, where do you stand? Not, where do you think you ‘should’ stand…”where do you stand?”

Once you answer that question, processing may be slightly easier….

#Recommit2016

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New Years Eve 2015

31 Thursday Dec 2015

Posted by in #Everyday2015, Be You, Just Do It, Live life, Love, Sex Love and Washing Clothes, Uncategorized

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Well we made it through 2015. I received sad news yesterday that a Dance Dad and friend passed away yesterday so when I wrote “we made it through” I felt something morbid or said or guilty that we made it and not everyone in that family did. While we are all planning our events of how we are going to bring in the new year that particular family is probably planning a memorial of how they will remember their father and husband’s life. He was a great guy and will be missed. I don’t believe he would approve of any of us morning or slowing down our celebrations or joy because of him. He probably would love it if we could take “good photos” of all of it! He was what my children lovingly referred to as our own paparazzi. He will be missed. This is a good reminder for me to not live in sadness and to live life to it’s fullest. Not everyday is guaranteed.

Dr-Seuss-Youer-QuoteSo for a bit of a review of 2015. Last year I had decided to Have sex, wash clothes/clean house every day. I was sure it would help my relationship, and house organization skills ect. Well I blogged everyday. I had sex most days but I am not certain that it made my relationship better. I think my relationship is better today than a year ago but we still have rough times. I think sometimes the pressure of sex everyday put a lot of pressure to make sex a great big thing and one or the other of us expected more than what we got. So that caused some tension. However we learned that being intimate, loving each other happens in many ways. Great sex is a good part of a good relationship but you don’t have to have it everyday. Sometimes just a snuggle or blow job is fine….

As for the “Washing Clothes” part, yeah that was going to be the stretch for me. When I started I was a stay at home mom trying to figure out how to ‘schedule’ my ‘unscheduled’ days. I was doing well until that week of bartending school. Since then it has been chasing clothes and picking them out the laundry baskets. The kids did great picking up chores over the summer and I hired a house keeper to come in every two weeks but was not pleased with her work and stopped having her come a few weeks ago and now I am needing to get a new house cleaning service, but haven’t had time to interview one. However, I feel my in-between house cleaner visits, my keeping up with it work is shining! Last time my Gma June Cleaver was here, she complimented how well I had been doing! Made me feel good (even though it was the day after house cleaner day) it is a process of constant work folks there’s no way around it. You just have to do it! (Bluh!!)

So I love to blog, I love my family, I love my life! I excel in the Love piece of this trinity! I want to keep doing it. I may not do it everyday in 2016 but I haven’t decided yet. I’ve thought of many scenarios including doing 3 a week one sex blog, one love blog and one washing clothes blog. But that may be too much structure for me. I may just blog on weekdays or when I feel so lead. I don’t know I want to try to keep them long enough to be enjoyed but short enough to give readers a chance to read in one trip to the bathroom or a bus ride or something. This post is reaching that “too long to read” limit but I have so much more to say!

You all have learned a lot about me this year. Maybe too much TMI but I have really enjoyed being free to write and put my thoughts out there and I am also pleased to say I never wrote anything I had to remove, or felt regretful about. There was one day I blogged angry, the hubs said he hated my post that day I said I know you do. and I gave him the option to write a “rebuttle but he declined) and the next day I posted about “making up” and how I felt I maybe shouldn’t have blogged so angry and may have painted the Hubs side in a bad light. I got a few likes on the I may have been wrong post vs the angry rant I made got zero …I see who side you are all on! Just kidding, it’s not about taking sides in life. I wanted to be real and that was real and so was the next day about making up you fight and you make up it is all part of life! It is about living free. So here are some last thoughts and lessons from 2015, okay maybe some advice:

  • Live Free
  • don’t get offended if someone “takes the other side” (they probably have not
  • Don’t feel like you have to pick a side.
  • Love with reckless abandon!
  • Have crazy sex just for fun …as much as you want
  • Have romantic sex aka Make Love …as much as you want
  • Don’t be afraid to try something new, in life, love or in bed
  • Be the lover you want, and the one your lover wants
  • Love the lover you have, be with the one you love
  • Push through the hard times they are temporary
  • Have sex more!
  • Love more!
  • Wash clothes more
  • Be You
  • Love yourself
  • Don’t judge

Okay that list was long so I cut myself off. It’s funny how some things on that list although different are much the same! I have loved this year blogging! I am loving being a working mom but still hate labels! Every mom is a working mom some just work outside the home as well! I don’t have my 2016 plan yet but I will keep blogging and keep Sex Love and Washing Clothes-ing! I am feeling the “Sweet 16” will need to be part of my plan or goal or resolutions for the year. So have fun tonight. Be safe and cheers to a Sweet 2016! May you live life to the fullest have no regrets and be the best you that you can be!

Maybe 2016 will be a publishing year?????

And for the last time, bitter sweetly,

#Everyday2015

 

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Don’t Believe Everything You Think

10 Thursday Dec 2015

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So I chatted with the boss the other day, I did get a bit of a raise and reassurance that my schedule will continue to be full and was told I am still his favorite! So with all the air cleared and knowing that I am a good therapist and  worthy of being a leader of this Massage team, why do I still feel insecure when he posted a picture of the new LMP on Facebook announcing her arrival? I don’t understand where this insecurity is coming from! It is not weird though I am insecure about everything! 

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I am working on that! I try to fake myself through those insecure moments. I get them with the Hubs too! I have to remind myself that I am a good massage therapist, a good wife, a good bartender, and a good mom even on days when I know I really fucked up! You never should doubt yourself, ever! I need to say that to myself “I never should doubt myself” Always do your best. If you are always doing your best even if someone surpasses you you have no need to feel down about yourself! As they say, leave it all on the field, always!!!!

You don’t have to believe everything you think! Just remind yourself of the good stuff and keep yourself in check.

#Eveeyday2015

Posted by | Filed under Massage Therapy, Self Care, Take the time to take care of yourself, Working Mom

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Live, Laugh, Love Today

12 Thursday Nov 2015

Posted by in Be Present, Live in the Moment

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quotes-life20Life is a gift. The people in our life are gifts. Stop taking your life for granted and live in the moment and enjoy it. Tomorrow is not promised and will be different. Enjoy tomorrow too, but don’t forget about today in thinking, dreaming or worrying about tomorrow. Today, right now, is the only thing promised. Live in this moment and take it all in!

We get caught up in planning and logistics and forget to enjoy life. We are all doing a lot, there is a lot on our plates we have to cook meals, clean house, go to work, call clients, follow up on that go to the doctor, exercise, eat right pick up the kids from practice coach their team. So much to do such a long list! But there are so many moments that if you blink you will never get back. Stop being sad these moments are passing, start enjoying them. Live in the moment love and laugh and just be in that moment!

#Everyday2015

Are You Sensitive or Surrounded by Assholes?

08 Thursday Oct 2015

Posted by in Friends, Love Your Kids, Raising Kids

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The Boy came out tonight after we sent him to bedand was telling us about something that happened at school. He was weepy his eyes welling with tears and was trying to be tough and not cry but I could tell he was holding something back. So I was like “dude, something is that it?” He was talking about a boy at school who was laughing at him about the girl he kind of liked last year (and he may still have a crush on) but really that was bringing him to tears? There was more the lunch ladies separated him and all his buddies because one guy was yelling at lunch so he couldn’t sit with his friend.

Well, come to find out there are a few issues. The boys have drama! They talk about each other behind their backs but mostly they make fun of each other, that causes drama. It causes the kids like The Boy to be sad and sometimes cry and then that opens up more doors to be made fun of. The circle goes on. The Hubs took on the normal husband role of “toughen up boy those guys are jerks!” Which is valid but speaking as a person who was the one who was made fun of and the made fun of more for how I reacted, I really can relate to The Boy! It breaks my heart to see him hurting but I know the best thing for me to do is to let him handle it.

Here’s the advice we gave The Boy. Take everything to each other. If you boys get in a fight about rules during football at recess stop running to the recess teacher and telling on each other. Handle it all right their within the group. So The Boy was told by the Hubs “tomorrow before football (they play football at recess and many times get in trouble because one of them get angry and then go tell a teacher) gather up the boys and say ‘let’s keep this between us.” We went on with “if they continue to be jerks, stop hanging out with them!” Those boys are jerks, they need to learn to stop talking trash about each other and they need to learn to handle things “in house”. When you don’t you risk losing privileges, as soon as you include a recess teacher you open up the door for them to take the football away or make up new crazy rules! So they boy has a task to talk with the boys. If I know him (I think he kind of takes after me) this is a hard task. Being honest with the friends calling them out… We’ll see if he actually does it. I wouldn’t place a bet on it.

The Boy is sensitive. He has a soft heart and I like it. I don’t want him to change that. But sensitive or surrounded by assholesI do want him to not let the Asshole friends ruin his day, or life or month or year or anything!!!

I hope The Boy felt supported by The Hubs and I but I hope he understands that he is in control of his life and who he is friends with and those people who are jerks don’t deserve his friendship! Sometimes Kids are so mean!

Dance Until You Find Your You

15 Tuesday Sep 2015

Posted by in Dance, Dance Like No One is Watching, Do You

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Yesterday I went back to dance for the first time since this summer! I have been so busy with football and just enjoying my family on the nights that I could so dance got pushed aside! Being Monday, The Hub’s is teaching and The Girl is dancing and luckily the boy had a buddy at dance to hang out with. Which made it a perfect night for me to be at dance. At first I felt like an outsider, the girls who had danced all summer had their little secret inside jokes and I felt left out. Once we got into actual dancing I put all of that out of my mind and checked in to me! It was Modern and we had an exercise that we were supposed to feel the music and the instructor would tell us what body part to move from.

IDance it out totally got into the music. This is why I dance! Everyone, everything, went away and I just felt the music. The teacher said to me “nice facials Ruby!” and I realized my face was showing the emotions inside of me. I was about to cry! Full of emotions that I don’t really know what they mean. I have been so busy that I haven’t been able to think feel or even know what any of that really is! When I was dancing I wasn’t thinking about my feelings or even knowing what I was feeling. I was just dancing! I even very smoothly went into the splits, just like a real dancer! (I didn’t even know what I was doing and then I was like WOW! Check me out!)

How can I be expressive in my dance when I don’t know what I am trying to express of feel or anything! The answer is “It doesn’t matter!” The idea that you have got know what you are expressing in my opinion is so untrue. Sometimes your dance will mean one thing to you and then something completely different to the person watching it! And that is perfectly okay. Just let what is inside of you flow out. When you have choreography, yes, you should know what your dance is supposed to mean, but that doesn’t mean the person watching it will get the same out of it. They will get what they need. So when you are free styling just dance what feels right!

I am so glad I got to dance last night! I so needed it and I am so glad I will be getting that every single Monday night. No football to interfere and The Hub’s is at work so I won’t feel like I am missing out on time with him and the Boy has a buddy who he can hang with while I am dancing and the Girl is dancing at the same time. So operation dance until you feel yourself is in full swing!

I love that I have dance even if it is only one night a week I hope and think it will help me to stay balanced and stay me for at least that one night a week that I get to dance, maybe I can squeeze in a little more dance or me stuff during the week!

Dance like no one is watching!

#Everyday2015

You Do Not Have To Choose, You Just Have To Live

24 Monday Aug 2015

Posted by in Be You, Do You, Love, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

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Today may have been the first day, all summer, that I had a full shopping trip at Costco. So yeah I dropped almost 4 bills for groceries today. But now the fridge is stocked and we can eat every meal at home (however I probably should have bought more eggs, oops). When I got home from the store I had to weight for the garbage truck to move out of my driveway, but I then cleaned out and organized my freezer. I did not scrub the bottom but I picked up all the crumbs and random french fries that were there from some weird science type experiment that my kids did one day probably 2 years ago. I filled up a trash bag full of old food and things that needed to be thrown away from freezer burn or that I just neglected to toss out before, and of course this was right after the garbage truck left. That garbage can is going to be ripe next week!

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Today I also went back to my counselor for the first time since the end of April. Since before I got busy at the massage office and before I started bartending. I sort of reflected on the summer and updated him with my life and what has been going on. We talked about how in the time that I have been seeing him (over the past few years), I have gone back and forth about being a stay at home mom and being a working mom. Similar to how my blog has gone this year. It was a very eye opening visit. It gave me a lot of perspective. I think he was surprised I am still doing my blog. The way it has shifted and changed and evolved but also stayed the same is similar to my adult life. Very interesting insight today.

A friend of mine said to me the other day that I should pick what I want to do. Stay at home mom or work…I do go back and forth all the time with what is “right” and today in my visit I talked about this. I don’t think I have to, nor should I “pick one”. Once I pick one or the other that makes one the right way and the other the wrong way. I am so, sometimes too, focused on what I am supposed to do or what the right thing to do is and that makes what I do right and/or wrong, and I don’t want to be wrong, I want to be me. I need to do me!

In life there never really is a right or a wrong. So I think for me my focus needs to be to do me. Whatever that is in that moment some days it is one thing and others it is another. As always my life and everyone’s life is very dynamic. It is always evolving and changing. The one constant is change and I am working on living in the moment and loving every moment and accepting ME just where I am.

#Everyday2015