Tag Archives: Don’t Judge Me

Live Stop Worrying

27 Monday Mar 2017

Posted by in Be Present, Be You, Do You, Don't judge me, Family, Love, Uncategorized

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worryingHello followers, let me start by saying. I am struggling.  Acutely today I have so much on my mind, so much that has happened, so much I want to accomplish and so much to write and share (because I haven’t written much lately)  and also some to keep private and not write about (we all know that is hard for me not to over share) and since I haven’t been blogging much this may be a little disjointed, I mean, more than normal. I was asked the other day to remove my filter…they obviously don’t read my blog or maybe they do because they know it’s possible for me to do so. But yes, in real life I have this filter. Call it a mask of sometime professionalism, sometimes shyness, just a filter that I don’t say everything I am afraid to be judged or I want to make sure I am being appropriate…I don’t really know why. So hear goes sans filter Ruby is going to spill and hopefully today organize my thoughts and life and get back on track where I want to be. And for you I hope you can be inspired by my thoughts either by realizing you are not as messed as me or by realizing you are not alone out there.

Why the fuck is it so hard to just live? I want to do so much but for some reason I am so tired. I get going and then my energy fizzles out. Today I wanted to get in a run, do some admin business stuff, some billing and returning phone calls, also wanted to clean and organize at the house catch up with laundry. This morning was a great breakfast. I was able to get the kids lunches made, then I made them breakfast. I made eggs, English muffin toast, strawberries and smoothies for the kids. The boy we struggle with eating and he ate his whole breakfast today. I was on a roll. Then they both got to school and I got home and had to do some computer stuff. Then it was almost 10:00 and I had to decide what to do…go for a run, or get ready and get to a business networking thing at 11:30 or do something else like clean or write in my blog…

Why the fuck can’t I just make the right choice for myself? Why don’t I do what I want to do to get me closer to where I want to be. I want to be a great mom that takes care of her family by cooking and cleaning and having a relaxed calm home environment. I also want to have a successful business and sometimes that means making sacrifices at home but I hate choosing which has to sacrifice. Balance is just not always an option!! But it has to be! We need balance to be healthy! Everyone does! Sometimes I feel like I am getting it and then the next day shit hits the fan and I am feeling fucked and not in a good way! I just want to figure life out why this fuck is it so hard?!

And why is it that when I feel like I have things under control the bottom drops out? So even when things are good, really things are pretty goo right now. Business is doing alright, life is good the Hubs and I are getting along and happy but this is how I felt in December when my life got turned upside down! I was getting in the groove of working the business, The Hubs and I were happy. I had some great (I thought) friends in my life all was well. Then the bottom dropped out. I am kind of waiting for that to happen right now. Life has really felt like it has slowed down. You know the way that commentators talk about the game slowing down for rookies in the NFL. Nothing changes they just get used to seeing the speed of the NFL vs College etc. Life has really felt like it’s slowed down and we are in the midst of competition and tournament season! What horrible thing is about to happen or has already happened that I am about to find out? Why the fuck do I have to think this way? Why can’t I relax and enjoy life? Why can’t I remove the filter? What am I afraid of?

PLAN: Here is my plan what I want anyway. I want to write more, exercise more, enjoy the moments I have with my family and have moments with myself and one on one time with the Hubs, and be successful in business so I can help my family do everything and have everything we want. Just that sentence brings tears to my eyes because it feels like so much and I am sad I have to say it out loud, how did I let myself get here away from these things? I should plan time for everything. Time for writing and exercising in my schedule and push myself to follow it. Get my house cleaned up and organized and then take time to keep it that way and having the business I may need to hire a housecleaner to help keep up on the house thing. I need a better plan and more than just giving myself grace I need to trust myself when I am feeling like things are slowing down. The game really is slowing down for me! I need to accept that. It’s time to pass the ball to my trusted teammates and manage this game in a way that will most benefit the team! I need to be MVP in my life so my team can win and winning is when we are all happy and healthy and enjoying life! That is balance!

What the fuck did I just say?! I really need to stay focused and push myself to get where I want to be and I need to pass the ball to those who can advance our life when needed. I need to stop worrying about the lineman who is going to hit me from the blindside and focus on the play and execute! I have a team to support me and need to use that. But it’s my job to manage this game I can and I will rock this. I need to allow myself to live and enjoy and celebrate the good times and stop worrying!

#Live2017

XXX-Ride Him-XXX

10 Wednesday Aug 2016

Posted by in Don't judge me, Hump Day Challenge, Just Do It, Sex, XXX

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So today’s Hump Day Challenge is brought to you by what I want to do but can’t do to a sleepover. I don’t know where it came from but knowing that I have an extra kid in the house is like having a sprained ankle and wanting to go for a run. How many days did you sleep in and say you will go later and when you get an injury all you want to do is go for that run.

Reverse CowgirlI would love to feel my husband’s dick inside my pussy as I am on his lap in reverse cowgirl position. We have this chaise as part of our sectional sofa and he is sitting there now. I keep imagining myself on his lap, we could even continue watching T.V. You see I have been super distracted with my business move and getting the football season started and have spent many evenings falling asleep before anything sexy happens. Some nights the Hubs has been able to arouse me and get me going and some nights he is just too tired to put in the effort, and now, tonight the boy has a buddy over and all I want to do is jump his bones and ride him reverse cowgirl! Why the fuck do things happen like that.

So today’s Hump Day Challenge is to take a ride ladies! Ride him reverse cowgirl. Let him hold your hips and rock them up and down and back and forth. Then turn and let him see your boobies bouncing as you ride him cowgirl and face him. Let him touch you, let him twiddle you nipples and enjoy the attention! I must say I love nipple play when we fuck!

So today may have been another on of those TMI posts but I needed some inspirational juices to get flowing and riding my husband reverse cowgirl was what was inspiring me! So go ride your man ladies!

#SEX2016

Baseball by the River

13 Friday May 2016

Posted by in Baseball, Family, Kids

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Hello Sex Love And Washing Clothes-ers! The Fam and I are heading south for a baseball tournament. Not sure the Boy can even play, but we are going g to support his team anyway! If he feels good enough and he can open his eye all the way the Urgent Care Doctor said he could play. We’ll see and we’ll play it very cautiously!

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Where we are camping at there is a river. I wonder if it will be warm enough to escape and have sex on the river bank? The Hubs and I have been busy and tired and not very adventurous with our sex sessions lately. Maybe at least we can get a walk in this evening and sneak away in the woods for a make out session or something! We just have to ditch the kids and all the other baseball Fams!

I am looking forward to building be relationships with the baseball team families. I really am. I love getting to know knew people and enjoy travelling and especially watch the Boy play! It will be a fun season, I hope!

However, I really would love a weekend away with the Hubs I think I will be looking for some plane tickets or at least a hotel room for the first non baseball or dance weekend that is schedule for mid July! Until then we will do our best to sex it up quietly I the trailer and runaway when we can hide from the kids to kiss make out and feel eachother up!

Here’s to a fun weekend!

#Recomitt2016

I’m the Birthday Bitch

02 Tuesday Jun 2015

Posted by in Be Present, Dance Like No One is Watching, Do Your Thing, Love

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Happy Monday! What a great day to have a birthday a Monday! My plan today was to start off the week and the year of being 36 right with a long run and a good healthy lunch, but then, the girl woke up sick with a fever so she didn’t go to school and I lost my opportunity to have a “me” day after my one scheduled massage. But oh well, it was still my birthday and the day that is my birthday is always better than the rest.

So I could say that is was a bad day but it was not. It was just a day that did not go as I had planned and did not meet my expectations of an amazing break out day that is the one that I was born on 36 years ago. But that does not make it a bad day. It was just a day. Later the Hubs is taking me out for drinks and I put a message out on Facebook to invite my friends out. But it is a Monday and I have no expectations that anyone will be there. So if I have friends show up that will make me even more happy. But it will be a very much needed night out for the hubs and I and we will enjoy my day or should I say night!

Today also consisted of auditions for the girl for her dance team next year! She, being sick with a fever of 100.6, went and learned her routine and performed for the instructors (Judges) and owners of the studio. Thankfully they let her go home early to get some rest as they know she has been sick and was even at the doctors today. So when we got home tonight, Gram was here watching So You Think You Can Dance. The girl is getting inspired by these dancers and igniting her passion or at least I am. She said she almost cried in her audition but wouldn’t tell me why. Weird, she obviously wanted to say something but didn’t… I tried to tell her she was safe to talk to me but for some reason she didn’t want to share. I hope that she does, one day, feel comfortable sharing these things with me so that I can be there for her in her struggles whether it is emotional or just moral support. Gotta give her space sometimes though, let her approach the subject when she is ready and let her know I am here. That is all I can do.

Well it is my birthday! It is my special day! I am going to enjoy the rest of it. So I think I am going to do my long birthday run tomorrow. No worries it is still my birthday week and I will enjoy it…. yes the whole week!!!

Have a great day, Happy Birthday to me! ❤

#Everyday2015

Overwhelmed I am!

27 Wednesday May 2015

Posted by in #Everyday2015, Be You, Washing Clothes

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Happy Tuesday that feels like a Monday and OMG! I am feeling so overwhelmed! Between my Things will work outwork at my massage office, learning bartending and to work at the bar, real life as in house work, grocery shopping, laundry, baseball scoring and team mom and end of season stuff, then add in my dance class, workouts that aren’t happening…I am just feeling overwhelmed so it is time to call in for help, wish I could hire someone to go grocery shopping for me but, I haven’t told the Hubs this yet, I am using part of my first few days of tips to hire a house cleaner to get my house in order and get back on top of the 8 ball. It is time to just get it done and get on track. So I will be handing over a nights worth of tips or so to have someone else clean up my clutter and get it to a place where we can all maintain it while I am working! For now this is a one time event we’ll see how we do after I get my schedule going and see if we need her regularly or not.

So in life, Baseball is coming to a close in the next few weeks, dance auditions for next year’s team is coming up and the girl can’t decide if she wants to even do it. 5th grade camp is two weeks away and then the end of the school year! The kids will be gone for a couple weeks with Gram and Gramps we may be going to Nationals, we will be going to Montana for a week. I have to do CEUs for Massage this week!!! There is a lot on my plate! I need to prioritize and get shit done! So for today this blog is short and sweet and just about finished, and still not making sense or flowing in any way that a blog should but who the fuck cares, at least I am writing!

I love you people keep reading and following I am pretty sure I will not literally explode, but I may! Whatever happens it will be fun to watch or read about! My next task is to figure out tomorrow hump day challenge! Maybe even try it out tonight! We’ll see!

Have a great rest of your Tuesday that feels like a Monday!

#Everyday2015

XXX-Five Fingers of Satisfaction-XXX

21 Thursday May 2015

Posted by in Don't judge me, Hump Day Challenge, Lock your door!, Sex

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Happy Hump Day! No school today because our teachers are rallying for better funding for schools! I support our teachers our schools need fixed now!!!

ShockerOk, so here we go with you hump day challenge. This is mostly directed to the men today. I am calling it Five Finger Satisfaction. Boys, you have some prep work to do. Get a manicure, or cut and file your nails down nicely so there are no sharp edges get out the pumas stone (your woman probably has one laying around somewhere) scrub off the hard calluses on your hands and fingers. Then when you are your wife get intimate start by touching her caress her body. All of it! Massage her back, rub her belly and when it feels right, sneak your hands down her pants. Play with her vagina on the outside. Play with her lips and clitoris then slide your fingers inside her.

If you want to take the time put your wife on a pedestal be it on the bed or in the corner of the couch or a fancy chair. This is her night to be the center of attention and get pleasured by you. You will have your turn, take your time with your woman and give her some undivided attention. Open her legs get on your knees and feel free to play with her pussy with your hands and add a little tongue whenever you desire she will not turn the tongue down, I promise! When you have got her really dripping wet from your kissing and fingering place on finger, your pinky gently touch on her butt hole, this is the beginning of the shocker (that is a good thing). Be gentle the goal here is to give her pleasure. If she is squeemish about ass play talk to her first (before you start anything) so she is not startled out of the mood. Let her know you are going to try something new that will lead to her pleasure (I may take a few trial runs and a few times getting comfortable with it and practice, we love practice) and let her know you will be very gentle with her and she is in control if she doesn’t like what you are trying you will stop and she gets to say when. Ladies who are given the shocker properly are happy ladies, happy ladies make happy men…Take the time to do it right!

So as you explore her back door with your finger that has been moistened with her juices from you fingering her and licking her. As she relaxes and enjoys it sink your little finger in her ass, but don’t shove it wiggle it a little but don’t dig a hole! The double penetration sensation for a woman can be very erotic and very pleasurable not much movement is necessary. This is a good way to open the door for anal sex or just a good way to get her close to climax (Seahawks voice kind of climax) and even get her off. As she writhes on your fingers and soaks up the pleasure, go at her pace. Let her enjoy, go slow, slower than you think, the more tongue the better! This is the start of really good anal play. She may have never considered it feeling this good and never given it a chance, communication is key and the fact that you let her have a say check in with her “how does that feel baby” “is my finger wet enough?” “What can I do for you to like it more?” “can I try it with my cock?” Okay maybe hold off on that last question but you know your wife if now is the time go ahead and ask. If she is new to ass play be patient. Don’t talk about it in front of your friends she may not want to admit to it but she will love your shocker!

Sometimes the transition between fingering her ass and anal sex is too much of a jump. It is usually the size difference that is a shock. Practice and patience is the best method to make it comfortable and enjoyable. Ladies relax don’t tense up, relax even your jaw (there is a wierd connection to down there and clenching your jaw, good for child birth too). If I can use myself as an example, the more horny I am the easier it is and better it feels so take the time for foreplay! Also you can consider using a butt plug (Here it is from Monday’s post). You can find butt plugs in many sizes and shapes. I love the Njoy brand it contours down it helps get you relaxed back there and it tapers down so that you are not wide open for the whole time. It is a nice full feeling and leads to great DP orgasms! I am going to add a few plugs to my Amazon store so check the store link for some options to purchase. I love the use of butt plugs it took me a long time to try them and to find one I like but ever since I did I have not looked back. Now it is time to experiment with new stuff too like my new sparkly one I bought on the way back from Portland.

So Men, take care of your woman and guess what, there might just be something in it for you! I hope you all enjoy, as always, go at your own pace. Do not ever push your husband or wife to do something that they are not comfortable with. Also don’t be afraid to expand your horizons! Get rid of your prejudgment and you may find something feels much better than it sounds, even if you don’t want to talk about it with your friends or claim that you like it, ass play is fun feels good and is well worth the time spent to really give it a shot! Best place to start is with the Five Fingers of Satisfaction trick! Enjoy!

#Everyday2015

No Judgment, Just Fun

19 Tuesday May 2015

Posted by in Don't judge me, Sex, Uncategorized, XXX

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Happy Monday! At first today felt like a Sunday after going out last night in Portland. We always have so much fun going out in Portland. We went to some strip clubs, the first is a well know steakhouse so we ate dinner there. After we finished dinner we sat and watched dancers for a while, then we went across town to another club. The second club had dancers that were much more personable, which made the experience more fun. And Besides, who doesn’t like boobies in their face?…

(Side note…. Ok, so today I have to confess that I am pushing myself to be bold and write what I am thinking and what is on my mind. Which may cause you to get judgmental on my. I am feeling the door opening for judgment. I am also questioning myself why can’t I just be me? This is the reason I blog and the reason I use a “pen name” but yes it is hard for me to be bold and put myself out there and to think I might be judged and misinterpreted. But I want to express the reason I do this is to encourage healthiness in relationships and I feel couples enjoying each other’s sexuality and having fun together is good and that is what the Hubs and I did yesterday…)

At the second club we were at, not only were the girls more forward and friendly they were also better dancers and performers. There were quite a few of them that caught my attention by wearing sparkly butt plugs. Now stop cringing it was pretty sexy and don’t knock anything until you try it. Yes, you read that right they had a special kind of jewelry. At first I felt myself being judgmental. It was not as weird as I would have thought if you told me the strippers would be wearing sparkly butt plugs. It was actually pretty cool. The way body jewelry was pretty cool. I decided that I wanted one too.

So I have spoken before about my Njoy butt plug. Not at huge length but I have I think I may have mentioned it in the “You Can Be My Back Door Man” hump day challenge. I have a butt plug. I have always been a bit anti-anal but in recent years I have become more open with more experience.  I have come to really enjoy anal play as well as DP play. The Njoy butt plug is a stainless steel weighted butt plug. It can be used for extended wear, which I don’t do much but, you could if you wanted. I have done some extended wear but nothing more that wearing it while cooking dinner when no one other than the hubs is home, (I must admit it is kind of a turn on having it in it.

 When I purchased my Njoy plug from a sex store in City Center in Las Vegas the lady there said that most people end up wanting a bigger one so she encouraged us to buy the medium when we originally purchased it. We (I) decided to stick with the smaller size being scared of going too big. However, there have been moments that I have thought that I would like a bigger one. Mostly when using it while having sex. I have considered mail ordering the next size up of the Njoy plug. But now I want a sparkly one.

So we stopped at Castles on the way home and bought a sparkly butt plug! I was bold and decided to go bigger with this one. What a good opportunity for me to adventure and try something new. So I did. I was bold and said, I am going to try to go up a size. Now, if you are new to the idea of butt plugs just do some research and see the options and how not really crazy these are, they are not THAT big. They have a tapered area that narrows down and keeps things not spread wide open and uncomfortable. (OK that was not stated very well but I hope you get my drift.) I suggest your start small and experiment. The metal plugs are fun because you can add temperature play as well. Start them off cold or warm (I like mine warm to start with usually but if we get the butt plug out in the middle of sex cold is fun!) ….I am feeling a Hump Day Challenge coming on…

Anyway we had a fun time in Portland. We had a amazing hotel sex after we went out to strip clubs and let go of inhibitions. Got out the Njoy butt plug too. We had a great time as a couple and I think our relationship benefited from this weekend. We both had fun, neither was pulling the other into something that we didn’t want to do. The Hubs is usually easier to convince to open up and relax at the strip clubs I usually need a moment to get my barings but once I do I have a lot of fun. What I like about going to strip clubs is that we get to have fun and be flirty and get the affirmation from someone else that we have a great partner, both of us do! We have fun together. I am not suggesting that this would be as good for everyone else as it is for us, but it could be. You must be trusting of each other. You are there to have fun together, no sneaking off with a dancer alone or pushing your mate to do anything they don’t want to. It is about the two of you not about the strippers or finding someone better than your partner. It is a great couple thing for us. It helps boost our attraction to each other, it helps us relax and be adventurous. We have fun together and are reminded of that when we do these things and just have fun! No judgments, just fun!

Find something that is your reboot thing. Something that gets you two to relax stop looking at the negative things and draws you closer together. For some reason strip clubs do that for us! We have so much fun and we have great sex after and there is no resentment or judgment or thinking in the back of your head does he like her more…. None of that! Just plain unadultured fun! I hope you find that! I can’t wait to play with my new toy tonight and hey, maybe you will get a new hump day challenge out of it!

#Everyday2015

10k Done Time for Fun!

17 Sunday May 2015

Posted by in Don't judge me, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

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Sitting at Rock Bottom Brewery in Portland after running the 10k at Rock and Roll Portland. It was an internal battle this morning deciding if I should do the full 13.1 miles of the half marathon course or the 6.2 miles in the 10k course. The Two courses were completely different this year, last year at mile 4 or 5 there was a turn you could go left to do the 10k or straight to stay on the half marathon. I had until then to decide. This year the half and the 10k started at different start lines at different times. Since I have 3 massages on Tuesday and have been having some foot and hip issues and did not train as well as I should have I decided to do the 10k.n This was after a bit of toiling and tears from me. I didn’t want to give up or be a quitter! I don’t think I was. I am still a bit sore from the run. The last time I ran was a week and a half ago! It was a good call doing the 10k.

So now it is time to party and have fun in Portland. The Hubs and I love it here in Portland. After lunch we went to the Nike store (I paused on my post earlier now finishing at the hotel) and to the Microsoft store where the Hubs bought me a new Surface for my birthday! Yay me! I even got to get a girly purple key board 😉 So I am finishing my post on my new Surface!

Later we are going to go out and have some fun. We are heading to The A-crop for dinner and drinks and entertainment. We definitely have fun here! It is a good couples weekend for us! We have needed a reboot for a while and now we have it! That’s why I run this race every year! We get to come to another state, stay in a hotel and have hotel sex and go to strip clubs and have a drink and just have fun. I love watching the dancers they mostly pretty talented. The Hubs enjoys watching the girls get all flirty with me. I sometimes get shy, but the girls like having couples in they have fun with us and we have fun with them. Then we get back to the hotel and have some amazing hotel sex!

I highly recommend a date night to strip clubs. If you are shy stay back for a while and if you get brave go up to the rail. I have been going and enjoy strip clubs but sometimes I have to hang back until I get my barings in the place. Don’t get jealous because you are there with your man and he is not comparing your body to the dancers. You should just sit back and relax and play along! (The Hubs’s friends are all jealous that he gets to take me to the clubs) Just have fun and make it a couples night! We are going to!

#Everyday2015

Don’t Let Your Wins and/or Losses Define You

03 Sunday May 2015

Posted by in #Mayweathervspacquiao, Be Present, Be You, Do Your Thing, Just Do It, Love

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my best will be enoughHappy Sunday! Did you watch the fight last night? We went to a friends house. To watch it. We are not super into boxing and I really don’t follow it at all. But unless you have been under a rock you have heard about the fight. Mayweather won the fight by decision. As I saw it Mayweather landed more punches that hit harder. Pacquiao although through a lot of punches they mostly grazed off and didn’t make good contact. So as I watched the fight the right man won. But no one KO so it is not black and white…which is so weird because everything is always black and white, right? ~Sarcasm

I have a hard time watching people beat each other up. I do however like to watch athletes do their thing and those two men are athletes at the top of their game in great shape! I love to see the dedication of months (maybe even years in this case) of hard work on display and for the person pay off. Even in the loss it paid off. Financially they both got paid a lot!{Winning} Emotionally now they have finally faced the other best guy in their sport, and for one got his hand raised as the victor! However, their ultimate competitor is not each other at all, it is themselves. Just in don't stop until you're proudwalking up to the ring, that is what they trained for. To put themselves in the ring to fight against someone at the top of his game. Man to man as they say, fighter to fighter, Champion to Champion. They are both champions or at least have been and no one can take that from them. Did they train to fight or did they train to win. They trained to fight. You fight to win, you don’t train to win. I mean, yes you can “train to win” but you don’t win in training. You win in the ring and in the ring you fight!

My point is that you can do all the training, you can put all your best moves out there and if someone else does it better, or different, or punches you in the mouth harder  and you lose, does all your training go to waste? I guess that depends on how you look at it. I like to think not. You control you, not anyone else and at the end of the day did you do your best? (Only you can answer that). I do have mixed emotions on this subject. Mostly because every fight (every situation in life ever) has to have a winner and a loser! Not everyone can be the winner and most of my life I was on the non winning side! So because of that I had to realize that even when I put my best out there someone else still was better. What can I do about that? Work to continually get better is the answer!

You work to continually get better but when you have worked your hardest trained to you top potential and put out your best effort on the field, in the ring or on the stage (or in you office job) and someone else still ‘wins’ then what does that say about you? worst best everWhat does it say about them? Does that mean you are not good enough? No, it means that that is not you path that day it was meant for someone else. It does not mean to stop training at you top potential, it does not mean you should retire, it does not mean you are not the best at being you! It doesn’t even mean that you did something wrong or messed up or have something to fix it just means that day they were better (or at least the judges thought so). On another day you may be better.

So bottom line: Stop Defining yourself with these small moments in life. Yes, for Pac and May this was no small moment. Pac can probably go back and look at tape and see where he could have done differently or been better. He may be able to go and see where he could have trained differently or maybe Mayweather was just better at defense or…many possibilites. But if he defines himself with this one fight he will have to define himself as a loser and we all know that he is not, he has a lot of wins already. He has a lot of money to prove it too.

How does this correlate with real life? Well in reality is doesn’t at all. But as a metaphor we all have losses. We could all on one day or another define ourselves as the loser. And on other days we are the winner. We all need to stop looking outside for the ref to raise our hand and say we won and look inside and see the fighter within! Just getting in the ring makes you a fighter, putting on the gloves and facing an opponent makes you a fighter, you have to fight to win! You have to train to fight to win. Sometimes you win, learnAnd when the judges say you didn’t win, or you get knocked out, go watch the tape and figure out how to do it differently next time so you can win. Always working at being your best and letting your best define you! Not comparing it to anyone even if that is your job or if you didn’t get the promotion because someone else’s best was better for that position, or just someone else was a better fit or the boss liked him more.

Always fight to win! Never define yourself with you losses. Always work to be your best and never miss an opportunity to be better! Even in a loss you can still be a great fighter, and be proud of that. Remember there is only one winner. The world is not black and white just because someone loses does not make them bad or less of anything. What matters is how you, the fighter, feel about you! Stop Defining yourself with your win and loss record…it doesn’t matter!

Love yourself, love your life, love your family and friends and enjoy this thing called life. That job, that game that fight….the loser gets paid too! You gain a lot in just trying and putting your best out there! Stand on your own two feet and be the best you can be. Fuck them all if they don’t like you!

Win or lose have sex, amazing sex with your lover tonight! That is all that matters!

#Everyday2015

Multitasking Mommy Dreamer Planner Worker

30 Thursday Apr 2015

Posted by in #Everyday2015, Be Present, Be You, Do Your Thing, Everyday, Family, Sex, Washing Clothes

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I am feeling a bit overwhelmed today, not necessarily in a bad way. I took some time this morning to reflect on this year so far. My Sex Love and Washing Clothes year! I started this blog for this year dedicated to being a good inspiring example of a stay at home mom who has ADD that can keep a house and do the stay home mom/homemaker thing. Then at some point realized that financially we need me to work. Not because my husband doesn’t provide well but As long as you know who you are who caresbecause our kids are not getting any cheaper and we would like to get a new car and not have to give up going out to dinner or skip Seahawks games ect ect…

I am scared I will be judged pourly by the stay at home moms saying that I couldn’t hack it, or let them down because I wanted to inspire us to feel like more than “just a mom”. The working moms will say I am not working full time anyway so it doesn’t count as being a working mom, real working moms work full time… (Why do we feel we have to judge or compete with eachother?) I feel a bit hypocritical knowing that I set out to be this example of a great homemaker and now I have changed my mind and decided for more reasons than one to go back to work. And more than that I decided to take on more than one industry…

I really just can’t sit still! I am a mom first, a wife …actually I am not sure if wife or mom comes first it depends on the moment, then I am a Massage Therapist, Young Living Distributor, and soon to be bartender and a house keeper. (Notice which is last in the order, um, yeah, same reason Washing Clothes is last in the title!) Oh and let’s not forget blogger! Am I a bit indecisive to say the least? I can’t make up my mind… I don’t know if this is a good or bad thing. Does it have to be a good or bad thing?

It is what it is. I love my life! I love the idea that I am going to be able to help this family accomplish financial goals and help people too! I would love to be able to make enough money that the Hubs (if he wanted to) could consider Coaching Football at the Jr High or High School level. I think he would be great but he would need to take off time from his real job to do so. I don’t even know if he would want to do that or if he would consider it at all or if his current job would allow it! But it is in the back of my mind and to take pressure off of him would be amazing. He is a great provider and great at what he does. He is a great coach and I think the world needs more like him! I can’t even imagine what it would be like to see him doing what he loves so much with kids who really appreciate the sport and who can really understand his passion for the game. (Nothing against the Hub’s current team they are just 9 and 10 though.)

I also think it would be amazing to buy a house on the Lake or Waterfront. Maybe get a Sail Boat. If I dream big and do the work, it will happen. If I plan well enough I will still have time to be a wife, mom and homemaker too! There is part of me that is thinking that I am crazy thinking I can pull this all off. Not only just the work but the dreams being fulfilled too!

There is a big part of me that knows you can’t have it ALL! Something has always got to give but I am truly motivated right now! I think I have a plan that can work: massage during the school day, bartending after 9 at night only 2 days a week or so and extra Young Living business stuff a little bit each day. Mondays will be cleaning days. When I get more busy and start making some money I may hire a house cleaner.

I will continue sex everyday but I have noticed as I have gotten busier, my house has gotten cleaner I am less “in the mood” at the end of the day. Not because I am not “in the mood” but I am tired and stressed about getting it (especially the Washing Clothes part) all done perfectly. I tend to look at everything that is not done or mistakes made and not focus on what got accomplished in a day. Some days what got accomplished is a massage or a cake being made or volunteering at school and I believe that is just as valuable as the clothes getting folded and put away.

She BelievedThere is a lot on my mommy plate and there is soon to be a lot on my ‘Ruby’ plate as well, but I am determined to make a lot of what I want to happen happen! I want to help my family succeed. A big part of that is being there to be the cushion for them all to fall on and to hug and kiss and support by running lunches in when they forget or by meeting the Hubs on a random Friday for lunch and going on field trips. I am a mom and wife first but in my “spare” time I will be a successfull business woman too! I am loving where my crazy ADD multitasking brain is taking me, right now! I hope to keep the focus and be able to do the Homemaker and wife stuff and keep my family happy all the while too!

#Everyday2015