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Christmas Eve

25 Monday Dec 2017

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Family, Live in the Moment, Love, Love Your Kids, Marriage, Marriage is hard, Parenting, Raising Kids, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

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Family, Framily, husband provider, I love Christmas!, Marriage is Hard, Marriage takes work!, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

The kids are in bed, presents all wrapped and set up for them to find in the morning. The Hubs is sleeping next to me after a long fun filled day of Seahawks away game party and the Christmas Eve gathering we have at our house. Today was a beautiful day. Our team won! Go Hawks! We had some of our best friends with us for dinner, drinks, cookie decorating, and spending quality time together.

Growing up Christmas Eve in my house was very similar. My Dad’s tradition was to set up the Christmas Tree on Christmas Eve. We would have an open house friends would come by and out an ornament on the tree and eat food and spend time with us. It was at that event on this night in 1996 that The Hubs and shared our first kiss. Who knew we would end up here 21 years later. I would not change it for the world.

We have had many bumps and turns in the road of our life. This last year has been a really rough year and I fear some roughness in our future, but at the end of the day, I look at this man and all we have created together and count my blessings and remember why I am here. I love this man who is snoring next to me. He is, sometimes, really hard to live with and sometimes, I want to ring his neck but he is my soulmate. We clash in many things but those are the things that balance us. We a have busy chaotic life that adds stress but one day the kids will be grown and we will slow down and we will cherish these years the most.

My goal for 2018 is living in the moment more and really enjoying our kids. We spend a lot of money and a lot of time on them. Sometimes that distracts us from enjoying them. They are fun to watch don’t here thing. The girl is an amazing dancer. I want to appreciate her dance more especially since she is talking about not dancing after this year. The Boy plays 4 sports now. He added Basketball once Christmas break is over wrestling will start and booked ending those are Football and baseball. He is a good athlete he has a good attitude and really enjoys what he does. I want him to know it’s about playing hard and doing well but mostly it’s about having fun while you do it. Same worth The Girl it’s not about winning scholarships at competition it’s about having fun, putting yourself into the dance and let it move you.

Today I sit here in appreciation of my family. The Hubs takes really good care of this family with his work and providing for us. We are able this year to help my mom out and got her a car that should last her a while. It is a nicer car than she has and most of all SAFE! I feel pretty thankful that my husband will also take care of my mom like that. I like to be able to play Santa to my mom, I know she will appreciate it and I am thankful she will have a safe car to use when she is transporting my children around town. She does that a lot! It’s a way of paying her back for that.

I am just in awe of my family right now. The Hubs and I have had a really rough year but right now in this moment I feel joy and love and appreciation. I want to hold that feeling close to my heart and focus on that in 2018.

#LoveAlways2017

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New Years Eve 2015

31 Thursday Dec 2015

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in #Everyday2015, Be You, Just Do It, Live life, Love, Sex Love and Washing Clothes, Uncategorized

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#Everyday2015, 2015, 2016, Be You, Live the life you love, Love, Love the life you live, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes, Washing Clothes

Well we made it through 2015. I received sad news yesterday that a Dance Dad and friend passed away yesterday so when I wrote “we made it through” I felt something morbid or said or guilty that we made it and not everyone in that family did. While we are all planning our events of how we are going to bring in the new year that particular family is probably planning a memorial of how they will remember their father and husband’s life. He was a great guy and will be missed. I don’t believe he would approve of any of us morning or slowing down our celebrations or joy because of him. He probably would love it if we could take “good photos” of all of it! He was what my children lovingly referred to as our own paparazzi. He will be missed. This is a good reminder for me to not live in sadness and to live life to it’s fullest. Not everyday is guaranteed.

Dr-Seuss-Youer-QuoteSo for a bit of a review of 2015. Last year I had decided to Have sex, wash clothes/clean house every day. I was sure it would help my relationship, and house organization skills ect. Well I blogged everyday. I had sex most days but I am not certain that it made my relationship better. I think my relationship is better today than a year ago but we still have rough times. I think sometimes the pressure of sex everyday put a lot of pressure to make sex a great big thing and one or the other of us expected more than what we got. So that caused some tension. However we learned that being intimate, loving each other happens in many ways. Great sex is a good part of a good relationship but you don’t have to have it everyday. Sometimes just a snuggle or blow job is fine….

As for the “Washing Clothes” part, yeah that was going to be the stretch for me. When I started I was a stay at home mom trying to figure out how to ‘schedule’ my ‘unscheduled’ days. I was doing well until that week of bartending school. Since then it has been chasing clothes and picking them out the laundry baskets. The kids did great picking up chores over the summer and I hired a house keeper to come in every two weeks but was not pleased with her work and stopped having her come a few weeks ago and now I am needing to get a new house cleaning service, but haven’t had time to interview one. However, I feel my in-between house cleaner visits, my keeping up with it work is shining! Last time my Gma June Cleaver was here, she complimented how well I had been doing! Made me feel good (even though it was the day after house cleaner day) it is a process of constant work folks there’s no way around it. You just have to do it! (Bluh!!)

So I love to blog, I love my family, I love my life! I excel in the Love piece of this trinity! I want to keep doing it. I may not do it everyday in 2016 but I haven’t decided yet. I’ve thought of many scenarios including doing 3 a week one sex blog, one love blog and one washing clothes blog. But that may be too much structure for me. I may just blog on weekdays or when I feel so lead. I don’t know I want to try to keep them long enough to be enjoyed but short enough to give readers a chance to read in one trip to the bathroom or a bus ride or something. This post is reaching that “too long to read” limit but I have so much more to say!

You all have learned a lot about me this year. Maybe too much TMI but I have really enjoyed being free to write and put my thoughts out there and I am also pleased to say I never wrote anything I had to remove, or felt regretful about. There was one day I blogged angry, the hubs said he hated my post that day I said I know you do. and I gave him the option to write a “rebuttle but he declined) and the next day I posted about “making up” and how I felt I maybe shouldn’t have blogged so angry and may have painted the Hubs side in a bad light. I got a few likes on the I may have been wrong post vs the angry rant I made got zero …I see who side you are all on! Just kidding, it’s not about taking sides in life. I wanted to be real and that was real and so was the next day about making up you fight and you make up it is all part of life! It is about living free. So here are some last thoughts and lessons from 2015, okay maybe some advice:

  • Live Free
  • don’t get offended if someone “takes the other side” (they probably have not
  • Don’t feel like you have to pick a side.
  • Love with reckless abandon!
  • Have crazy sex just for fun …as much as you want
  • Have romantic sex aka Make Love …as much as you want
  • Don’t be afraid to try something new, in life, love or in bed
  • Be the lover you want, and the one your lover wants
  • Love the lover you have, be with the one you love
  • Push through the hard times they are temporary
  • Have sex more!
  • Love more!
  • Wash clothes more
  • Be You
  • Love yourself
  • Don’t judge

Okay that list was long so I cut myself off. It’s funny how some things on that list although different are much the same! I have loved this year blogging! I am loving being a working mom but still hate labels! Every mom is a working mom some just work outside the home as well! I don’t have my 2016 plan yet but I will keep blogging and keep Sex Love and Washing Clothes-ing! I am feeling the “Sweet 16” will need to be part of my plan or goal or resolutions for the year. So have fun tonight. Be safe and cheers to a Sweet 2016! May you live life to the fullest have no regrets and be the best you that you can be!

Maybe 2016 will be a publishing year?????

And for the last time, bitter sweetly,

#Everyday2015

 

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Finishing a Long Tuesday the Right Way

19 Wednesday Aug 2015

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Marriage is hard, Marriage is work, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

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Busy, Long Day, not too tired for sex, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

Fuck me!! It is still Tuesday for me!!! Took the kids to the fountain park then went to work at the bar for my Tuesday night shift!
I’ve had a busy packed day so I haven’t got a chance to blog yet. My shift was steady at the bar so I didn’t get a chance to sit down and take a break and blog. I did talk about writing and my blog to another bartender at the end of my shift. I started Sex Love and Washing Clothes as a stay at home mom to help encourage stay-at-home moms to be happy and content with themselves and life in general. To encourage couples to have good sex and enjoy life together. And now here I sit at the end of a shift of my ‘second job’ …oh how this year has evolved me and this blog.
I’m going home now and I’m going to fuck my husband. I will wake him up if I need to, I’m pretty sure he won’t get mad at me for that, but he might get mad at me if I decide to continue blogging instead of fucking him good night Readers.

#Everyday2015

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XXX-Progressive Sex-XXX

03 Wednesday Jun 2015

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be Present, Hump Day Challenge, Sex, XXX

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Hump Day Challenge, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes, XXX

Have you every been to a progressive dinner? I have when I was in my Church Youth Group growing up. A progressive dinner is where you go from one location to the next for each course of the meal. Appetizers at one place, salads somewhere else, main dish at another location, then dessert at a final location. If I did this as an adult I think we would end for drinks and dancing somewhere else. So today’s Hump Day Challenge I am calling it Progressive Sex! (Now, it can be in one location at home if you need so no excuse don’t back out!) Ideally you would use a date night out for this I love Wednesdays it’s date night here!

First course is appetizers or flirting: Start with sexual appetizers flirting with each other, maybe telling each other stories about what you are excited to do with each other at the final stop. Make this an event do this part as you put on your girls favorite shirt and wear her favorite cologne (I love it when the Hub’s wears Eternity). Ladies wear the tall heels and the hair product that keeps him smelling your hair the whole night. Talk about where you are going prep for the night and by prep for the night what I mean is be showered, shaved maybe even wear clothes that are easy to get off and wear the matching bra and panties…

Second course Salad or what I am calling pre-fore-play the kissing and make out phase. Go out to dinner, continue the first phase on your drive and extend it to kissing and touching. Maybe sneak in a little make out session before your food gets to your table. Kiss her neck as you sit next to her rub his thigh under the table and maybe even slide your hand up and “accidentally” rub his cock through his pants. Take a bathroom break together and passionately kiss in the hallway. Talk about what you want to do when you get home keep that flirting going the whole time. Be playful and then progress into your next phase and/or location.

Third Course is traditionally the Main Course the meat and potatoes for this I am calling it the foreplay phase. Pay for your meal and as you walk to the car hold hands, then let them wander and wrap around your partner the caress her ass, ladies touch his in return too. When you get to the car before you get in kiss you two will probably want to rip each other’s clothes off by now but refrain. This is a hard core make out session. Open mouthed kisses touch his face and the back of her neck. Caress her boobs and rub his shoulders rub up on each other. Let it go for a few minutes and peel yourself away from each other and head home for dessert. Touch his leg as he drives make sure you stay safe and he can focus but here is a good time to insert a little road head if you prefer.

Once at home as soon as you cross the threshold of your home go buck wild! Rip each others clothes off. But don’t go right into sex. Take your time let getting your cock inside her hold off for more sensual and naked foreplay. Kiss her body, let her suck your cock, suck on and play with her nipples. Put every type of foreplay you know your mate likes into this dessert sex session! When you two get to the point where neither one can wait any longer then take your proverbial first bite of sex. Play with your favorite positions and really do what your partner likes.

Think of satisfying the other person and allow yourself to be taken care of. If you both do this you will both have a great experience. Let go of expectations, during the first few course of your progressive sex you can talk about what you like and what you want and make your plan of how you are going to please your lover. Progressive sex is for you to make the whole night about sex!

What a fun hump day challenge! Take the time to think about what you like before you start off for the night. That way you both can have the experience you want and be ready to converse during your date and your journey through progressive sex. As always relax and have fun with it. Reach outside your box a bit, modify as needed but stay true to your Progressive Sex Night and make it all about sex and your lover! Enjoy!

#Everyday2015

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10 Random Reasons Why I Sex Love and Washing Clothes

16 Thursday Apr 2015

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in #Everyday2015, Be Present, Connection, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

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List, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

Happy Beautiful sunny Thursday! Today I am not really certain what I want to write about. Sometimes this #Everyday2015 thing gets tough to come up with something witty or funny or wise to say. The goal is to get people reading my blog. To help relationships and to inspire moms to be more than “just a mom” and really rid the world of that phrase all together!Your story

So how do I get followers? Is there a blogger way to increase readership? Do people pay sights or readers or have dummy accounts to just up their likes? I don’t know, frankly who cares. What matters to me is that the people who are reading my blog (reading my life and sometimes my soul) get inspired. They use it as motivation. Sometimes motivation of what not to do, but motivation none the less.

Here is a list of 10 random reason why I continue to write and do all the Bare Necessities of Sex Love and Washing Clothes everyday! #Everyday2015

1. I want people to see that two people who are in love can stay in love and get through the tough shit.

2. I want people to see that a mommy can be respectful and professional and cuss a little (sometimes a lot) and not sound uneducated. (There is my excuse for using foul language BAM! one important task done.)

3. I want women to feel empowered even when sometimes I don’t. You can still feel empowered tomorrow if the laundry didn’t do it for you today. (trust me been there done that) overall I feel like an empowered woman we all are! Yes there are moments when I feel like Cinderella but someone has to do the laundry we can’t afford a maid.

4. I want to get myself healthy in this process of inspiring others to be healthy! Writing a blog everyday is kind of like journaling. It’s kind of like work that you don’t get paid for to and time that you never get back until you go read some of your stuff and are impressed with yourself. But it is very therapeutic!

5. I want to prove that staying together with my husband because we have good sex is a good enough reason for any couple to stay together (although it is not a good enough reason to become a couple you need more than sex to make it through tough relationship and family things)

6. I want to be able to say I have had sex for a year and maybe sometime during or at the end of this year I or even we (meaning the Hubs and I, since I am not doing this #Everyday2015 thing alone. Sex is the first word in the title.) will get interviewed on the Today show or write a book about it or trend on Twitter about it…

7. I want to help my marriage thrive! I believe Sex Love and Washing Clothes has helped. Some moments it does feel like it has been a bit of a strain on us as well.

8. I have always wanted to be more real in real life. My writing is real and it is a stretch for me to put some of this stuff out in the cyber/real world. It is helping me to be more myself and bold and real in the actual real world, maybe one day I will use my real name…

9. Maybe I can get paid to do it, by the end of the year, or I can be like my blogger friend and get invites to really cool events to write about them. Or she gets samples of things to try out and/or give away to her readers…but I think I need more than 25 followers to be desirable for a brand or company to pay me for that or for and event to invite me to write about them, maybe by the end of the year I will be.

10. I like to talk about sex. I think we women and moms need to talk about it more. We need to be more open and bridge the gap between us and the kids and tiredness and real life momness to our husbands and what better way than having sex. The world in general needs more committed relationship sex happening! Not the flings, or affairs on the side or one night stands our single friends are having! More married/committed people in relationships need to be having more sex!

This list is not in an particular order nor are these the only reasons I do what I do! It stimulates my ADD brain and that is good positive and always welcoming in for me in my head! Go do what you like, do what stimulates your brain! Enjoy your life, carve out time for that every single day! And Have sex with your life mate, your lover, your spouse every single day!
image

Follow and like my blog if you want more of this everyday!

#Everyday2015

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Let’s Up The National Average

09 Thursday Apr 2015

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in #Everyday2015, Family, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

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#Everyday2015, Marriage takes work!, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

I just spent the morning reading up on Talent Agencies. The Girl went to a recruiting agency that I think wants you to pay them to develop her. I have to call back at noon to find out if they want her or not, but they loved her pictures. My gut is telling me that if she really does want to explore show business we are going to have to do something else. If this company thinks my daughter is marketable, when it comes to this business they would get her a job, find a company that likes her look and get the commission off of that. If I pay them to ‘develop’ her they are already making money and what incentive do they have to actually get her a job, if they are already making money off of me paying for her ‘training’. Anyway…if there are any of my readers out there who know the business feel free to contact me with details of things I need to know. I will probably be sending out pictures and emails to agencies in the area to see how she can explore this since it sounds like she really wants to explore this, along with her dance.

As I sit here writing I hear a story on the news that perks me up. A stat: 37% of Grilled Cheese lovers have sex 6 times a month vs only 23% of non grilled cheese lovers (credit Q13 Fox News not sure what their source was, I could only pay so much attention and retain that much of the information). Apparently there is a link between relationships and Grilled Cheese. This got me thinking a couple of things. For one, who figures out this stat? (It’s like baseball they have broken down stats for everything down to batting averages when the pitcher takes a bathroom break this is sarcasm. I love baseball, this is not a dis). And two: is 6 times a month a lot? Does having sex 6 times a month make your relationship good? Because, I don’t think I like the idea that 6 times a month is a ‘good’ number for a months worth of sex!Frequency

If 6 times a month makes your relationship good I bet all my readers have amazing relationships. I guess that does bring up the average to more than once a week. Which sounds better than just 6 times a month. What is the national average anyway? …hold please need to tab over to do a search… That was not as easy as I thought it would be. I had to do math and get a bit creative combining some of the information that I found. With quick math averaging out the information I found from the Kinsey institute the national average is about 89 times per year (averaging the age groups 18-29 112 times/year 30-39 86 times/year and 40-49 times/year). Which is about 7 times per month so the grilled cheese stat is close to the national average with some obviously being higher and some couples being much lower and the number I looked at were not necessarily coupled individuals. If the national average is 7 and grilled cheese lovers have it 6 I would say grilled cheese loving does not necessarily correlate to “good relationships”….

Does it matter? I think, after yesterdays hump day challenge, lovers of whipped cream and chocolate probably have sex more than 7 times a month. Did you do the challenge. I did, and I was enjoying the sensation of the cold whip cream on my nipples almost as much or more than the sensation my husband licking and sucking if off of them. What was your favorite part? (I forgot to mention to be careful with sugary substances near the vaginal opening as sugar can increase yeast in the area so always be careful when using sugar during sex.)

How often is sex necessary for a good relationship? My husband would just simply say more or there is no cap on it. For me it is not about frequency but depth, and not depth in a physical way but in an emotional way. Connect with your love. Open eye sex when you look at each other and see in their sole as your bodies rub against and into each other. Also the moments when you are not having sex matters too. For now we, the hubs and I, are on the everyday plan and I kind of like it. I know the hubs likes it. Sex is a positive touch anything positive you should have more of it in your life! I think it has lead to less arguments and more sex. Not that we have sex to avoid arguments (although we have at times) but the thought a good sex can sometimes lead you to not want to anger your love so they won’t want to have sex later. It causes us to be more conscious of what the other is feeling and sometimes that means being less argumentative and more understanding and careful with their emotions. Leaving more room for that positive emotional and physical connection during sex.

Sex Love and Washing Clothes has been great for me this year. How is it doing for you? Are you on the everyday plan? For sex love and/or washing clothes? Do you do at least one of these things everyday or do you do all of it everyday? I try to do it all but there are days the clothes get forgotten and a small few days, 5 or less, where the sex has not happened due to fighting, tiredness or being TDTF and sometimes just life. But we are definitely well over the national average and our relationship still has it’s ups and downs but doing something proactively to be positive has helped us stay together and not fall into the really low low valleys that we were in last year and in years previous.

A new goal I have for this blog is to up the National Average of times couples have sex! Can we get to 10 times per month? Here’s to being part of upping the National Average.

have sex

#Everyday2015

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I Do Care, But Not Enough To Let It Change Me

27 Friday Mar 2015

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be You, Connection, Don't judge me, Just Do It, Sex

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Acceptance, Be You, Marriage takes work!, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

Happy Thursday! Do I still have readers out there? After yesterday’s blog I was worried I may have turned a lot of people off. The thing with putting yourself out there is that you really have to not care what people think of you when they don’t agree. Not take it personal if they don’t like what you have to say. The Hubs was talking about  a friend of his that he went to high school with yesterday. She apparently has been out of work for a while and is pretty good looking and she decided to send in pictures to some bikini coffee places to get a job there. The Hubs says “Wow, how cool is that for her to just put it out there that like that, BAM. Good for her for just being honest and not caring what people think of her…” then he paused and said “Well, it’s probably not much different from you and your blog. Especially today!” Why yes, I was thinking the same thing as he was talking. Good for you girlfriend, if you have a body for selling coffee in a bikini go get you some coffee girl!

The problem with not caring what people think about you is that you have to actually not care. The reason we blog is to have people reading it. If I don’t have anyone reading it, will that change anything? No. But if I am honest I do care what people think. I want them to respect me and my writing. I also would like them to me as well but I will settle for respect. They don’t have to agree with what I am saying or even like it. But if I am honest I do kind of care what people think. But I don’t care enough to make it change me!what people think

I like to be honest I want to encourage wives and husbands to work on the hard stuff in their marriage and have sex to increase that togetherness. For me sex has really helped my marriage. So many marriages are stale! Having sex only once a week, once a month or even sometimes less than that! The one thread that has held my relationship together when we were both just about checked out was that we had good sex. Even if you don’t have good sex yet, you have to start somewhere and bad sex is still better than no sex!

Sex is one thing we do that both of us are in the moment. We put aside the arguments, the disagreements and get into the moment. We feel our bodies we try to put aside expectations, sometimes it is hard even during sex but we try to, and do accomplish it with sex, most of the time. We are learning to do that more often in other arenas in life as well. Sex has been what taught us to do that. Subconsciously, it was not on purpose but that is what worked for us it might work for you. Since I started Sex Love and Washing Clothes and the Bare Necessities of having sex everyday our lives have been…in a word better, much better. Daily getting the positive connection that comes with sex, positive skin to skin touching, feeling good, the feel good hormones released in our brains when we orgasm all of that has value and we have been getting it everyday! What are you holding back for?

Here I am justifying yesterday’s post with my mantra of Sex Love and Washing Clothes! I don’t need to do that. My views and your views do not have to be the same. You can still respect me even if you think Anal Sex is evil.  Right?! I say yes and for my purposes, that is all that matters to me. So take this from me, go have sex everyday (or at least more than you do now). If your marriage is stale if you are less than pleased with sex give it up to your lover try my challenges and relax Sex everydayand enjoy those feel good chemicals that are released when you and your lover are together and touching and loving and orgasming! I want to help marriages all over and for me that starts by encouraging good sex! I am not a therapist, you may need one but first get naked with each other and touch each other and kiss and insert parts into each other and feel you body and enjoy it!

Keep Calm and Have Sex Everyday!

#Everyday2015

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XXX-You Can Be My Back Door Man-XXX

26 Thursday Mar 2015

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Hump Day Challenge, Just Do It

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Hump Day Challenge, Sex, Sex Love and Washing Clothes, XXX

Happy Hump Day everyone! OK so I teased it the other day and I am finally (sorta) ready to write about this topic: Anal Sex. Actually I am not, I have been procrastinating all day! Why?! Probably the same New Adventuresreason you all just gasped because for some reason it is one of those unmentionable, unspeakable even taboo topics. Now before your stop reading and start judging me, read the rest. I have not only decided to just write about this topic I have decided to make it a Hump Day Challenge. Now back down fellas and ladies RELAX.

The topic has long been a bit of a Taboo. Especially for your’s truly here. It took me a lot of convincing and a lot of research to make sure I wouldn’t be in adult diapers forever! That was a main concern of mine. I don’t know what changed me. WebMd for one and other articles and books I read written by Anal Sex experts. I used to be a prude when it came to everything sex including anal sex. (Underscore used to as in past tense, not anymore!) My husband, however, was not. His first sexual experience was with a girl who would only have Anal Sex, at a very young age might I add. When we first started having sex (remember he was my first) I was not super comfortable with the idea of sex at all, let alone anal sex. When he said anal sex, I was like “WTF is he in the closet and really gay?” (Actually it would have been more like “Oh my word” I was a prude when it came to cussing too.) Contrary to what my young inexperienced self thought, that is not it either. Many straight men (and women too) enjoy and desire anal sex, it is very normal.

Maybe I should have worked up on this subject rather than throwing it into a Hump Day Challenge right away. We will ease into this settle down ladies and gents. Let’s start with saying there is no such thing as Taboo! There are no forbidden things here, here being in your bedroom or where ever you choose to privately do it. Anal sex can be very enjoyable, and it can be excruciatingly painful! (I have experienced both). Since we were young when we got married, I was very inexperienced and did I mention we were young? My husband was less than suave, patient and slow about approaching the subject… Let’s just say with experience, age and maturity on both sides of this relationship we have come to really, REALLY enjoy anal sex. You have to RELAX, you have to be ready for it and it has to be mutual decision. You cannot sneak up on you lover and shove it up there!

You must go slow be soft use lots of lube! The anus does not self lubricate the way the vagina does. This may be the biggest help for you to understand if you are just getting started having anal sex. I have experimented with a lot of different lubes my favorite is Jo Premium (you can buy it from my amazon store click on the link to the left in the sex section). I suggest that you start with some fore play. There are a lot of nerve endings in the area. Use lube, even when just starting foreplay near the back door have your fingers lubed up, some saliva from so good oral will do fine too.In Bed

If you are not into full on anal (at least not yet) make this challenge an anal play challenge it does not have to be all anal! You all know I am pro oral sex. I love the licking of all things sexual! Both ways. Ladies your man likes his balls licked and may also enjoy some anal licking.

Start off today’s adventure with some fun foreplay. Licking sucking fingering more licking. Some pre-grooming in the area may help the giver feel more comfortable and less squeamish (I personally am not a fan of hair down there at all, but that might be just me). If you get into some really good oral use the fingers to slide into the vagina and play with the G-spot use those fingers around the opening of the back door. Just feel it, let her feel it what it feels like. As you are still licking and sucking her gently push on her opening and on into her back side. She may get excited or may back off. Please, it should go without saying, make sure that she is into this and ready for it. Don’t make it weird and awkward. Don’t sneak up on her, if you do she will probably lock that back door and throw away the key! If you do it right she will be in heaven!

Once you two get comfortable with the fingering part (try one in each hole that DP affect is a really nice feeling for her) try a little pressure against her back entry with your manness. (This is where it gets weird trying to figure out positioning and such but try to be a comfortable and relaxed as possible) figure out which position you want to try from. Doggie is the most obvious that people think of. In my experience it is the most uncomfortable however I have heard some women prefer it because you can stimulate her G-Spot from that angle and an anal G-spot orgasm feels amazing for both participants. Try spooning the lady can lean back into him and control the speed and depth and the man can also push towards her slowly as well, and it kind of limits how far he can actually go in. We have had success with man on top ladies legs kind of up and she relaxes her legs down on him and he pushes into her (this may be a bit advanced for beginners it is a little confusing and tough to see where you are going but it is my preferred position) then he can lean down on you and rub up on you chest to chest in a missionary position. You can also try girl on top cowgirl style this way she controls how fast he enters her and can rock forward and fuck chest to chest (I am a huge fan of chest to chest fucking, back door or otherwise).

Bottom line as with every week when I do these Hump Day Challenges there are two of you, you both need to be into it. If he is timid take it easy if she is scared try the oral with a little anal licking and fingering around it no insertion yet. I highly recommend you leave you judgments outside! Forget how Taboo it might have been before you gave it a try. Anal sex is not just for birthdays any longer ladies! I am telling you anal sex orgasms feel amazing not just to me but to the hubs as well. We all enjoy making our lover orgasm we get pleasure by pleasing each other. When I finally relaxed and enjoyed anal and the Hubs saw me have my first “Anal O” he was so excited that I finally enjoyed it he was in awe! If we smoked cigarettes we probably would have lit up! (I’ve never understood that smoking thing but I think you know what I mean.)

If you are one who is a little timid and scared of Anal Sex for many reasons here is a link to an article that I think you would like it’s kind of a Girls Guide to Anal Sex. I had some of the concerns about anal sex when I first started and I go back and forth on some of them occasionally. Biggest thing you have to have consent, you have to use lube. You have to be all in. Meaning if you don’t relax enough you won’t enjoy it. If it hurts you are probably doing it wrong but just remember the more you relax and the more you are into it the better and smoother it will be. Use these articles, books, and good lube (lot’s of it) and love to communicate in a way that both people feel comfortable.

If you don’t want to do this challenge your wimps way out is Oral with Fingering. I hope I did not just lose a bunch of readers I hope you give a new thing a chance and enjoy. Remember everything is not for everybody! Go at your own pace and that of your lovers as well. Que up some fun porn that the two of you like, drink some grape vodka, get loose and have fun back door or front door. Sex is sex and it all feels good! Have some fun good sex tonight lovers!

#Everyday2015

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Friends Are The Family We Choose

20 Friday Mar 2015

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in Be Present, Be You, Connection, Family, Friends, Love, Marriage

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Acceptance, Be You, Love, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

Family we choose

Happy Friday and First Day of Spring lovely’s! It is Friday before the Hub’s Birthday party! I am making lasagna today. I spent the morning making the sauce from scratch. Well, almost from scratch, does it count if you start with canned tomato paste and puree etc? I seasoned it cooked up some sausage and ground beef with onions and garlic in it. The sauce is now in the crock pots (yes I made enough  sauce to fill two crock pots, how many lasagna dishes is that going to make?) Bottom line, my house smells yummy!

Tomorrow is a big day! The day that we gather friends and some relatives, all family, to celebrate my husband turning one more year older. I invite almost everyone we know and prepare for a bunch of peeps and watch 3 will show up. It seems lately everyone is super busy. It’s not just us it is all of our friends right now. We all have kids who are super involved in sports and activities. We met most of our friends because either we or our kids were involved in activities that we or our kids have participated, so of course we all get busy and go in different directions sometimes. Some times we get down about not having time for us (the adults in the family) with our friends. It is always about the kids, their friends and their activities! We were spoiled there for a few years we have had so much fun with our friends. But lately we are all going different directions. We miss them.

I am sure they miss us too but sometimes in the back of your head you go, “Are they really busy or do they not like me like they used to?” I realize that is a very childish and somewhat immature and definitely insecure view of this but I am real and I do have these feelings sometimes. Sometimes I will run into a friend and she will say I miss you so much thFriends like boobsen we will make a plan to do something or get together and she will flake out or ‘forget’ to call back and give the minor detail of what time we were going to meet up for that drink…. We all have those friends. You feel so close to them when you are together and then they never follow through with what they said they would do after you two part ways at least until they need you for something in the future.

Then you have the true friends who are simply just as busy as you are. When you do run into each other you feel like you have never been apart. I have a friend who lives out-of-state, we see each other once a year (when she comes home to visit her family I am embarrassed to say I never go there). We rarely talk on the phone or text but when we do get together we make and effort to see each other and we always catch up on life in a bout 30 seconds. I will be venting about my life and she about hers and giving each other advice about life. We could have been separated for 9 months and we are so intune to each other. I have two friends like this and I miss them so much I wish I could just move my life where they are!

I have great friends! I have helped some move, picked up their kids from school and practices and they have picked up mine. Then there are those who hold your hair after a long night of drinking and you will hold theirs no questions asked. Or those who will fight off the chick flirting with your husband at the bar! Then the friends who you always have by your side when you are venting and complaining about him at the same time! Then you have the friends who greet your husband with a kiss and you don’t bat a jealous eye at all! Your friends who you kiss because no word expresses the same feeling as that kiss. Let’s not forget about the strangers who think we are swingers, shout out to those people here. We are all friends, that is normal right? I love my friends! I miss my friends…actually they are all my family that I got to choose. They would be there for me when I need them.

I have cried on their shoulder, they have cried on mine. I have listened to them complain about their husband and have listened to their husband complain about them. I have friends who have broke up and still love them both the same. True friends don’t make you take sides and true friends remind you why you are married and tell you and your husband must work things out because the two of you are the only reason they believe in  love in the first place.

I am hoping to see some of these great friends this weekend and I am considering forwarding this in an email to all of them. I love you friends! Come celebrate our friendship tomorrow during the Hubs’ birthday celebration. Funny thing is, it is on the actual birthday of one of our other best friends. He has been referred to in the past as my best ‘girlfriend’ as well! We needed the Hubs’ birthday celebration to be this weekend and Saturday worked the best because of last week’s dance convention (have I mentioned we have a busy life?) It just so happens that we have a lot of friends with birthdays in March!

I kind of miss the swinger rumors because it was fun to play it up when the group of us were out on the town. And we got to see eachother more often back then. We all are close, we all trust each other and we all love each other! There are a lot of us! Rarely do we ALL get together especially in recent years. Babies are being born, other babies are no longer babies and are active kids (mine) and teenagers are teenagers and need more supervision than expected! My kids are almost old enough to be the babysitters so they can babysit the younger kids and we can join the friends whose kids have graduated that have more freedom. Then, the whole gang can be back together! Minus those who have moved away!

Things will never be like they were! That is why we must enjoy everything in the moment. You never get a chance to repeat a moment! Make the most of it when it is happening. Stay off your phone and who cares what whoever else is doing on Facebook. Stay with those who are here now. Love each other, be there for each other. Forget that they flaked on you last week or last month or last year and ignore the rumor you heard they were talking trash about you. Because right now you are having a good time and right now that is all that matters!

Can’t wait to see you all my friends tomorrow! Hope all of my readers get the chance to enjoy yourself and your friends who are more like family this weekend too! Maybe something extra fun will happen. I dare you to stay off Facebook and whatever else on your phone that distracts you and just enjoy those you are with! Give your friends a big kiss as a greeting and if you are my friend I expect a kiss tomorrow! I am in a love fest mood, so kisses to you all! (There is an opening for the swinger rumor, maybe I should be more careful how I word things….nah that will never happen.) Enjoy your family that you have chose and dare to immerse yourself into your friendships! I am going have some Grape Vodka and enjoy the time after hours with the Hubs too! Happy Birthday to him!

#Everyday2015

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What Am I Going To Write About?

19 Thursday Mar 2015

Posted by Sex Love and Washing Clothes in #Everyday2015, Be Present, Be You, Everyday, Lock your door!, Love Your Kids, Mom Stuff

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#Everyday2015, Acceptance, Be You, Homemaker, Love, Marriage takes work!, Sex Love and Washing Clothes

When I have an idea of what to write about I need to write it down. Almost first thing the morning when I was making breakfast and lunches for the kids I thought of something to write about today, it was going to be good. But here I am sitting in front of my computer blank. I have no idea what it was that I was going to write about. So here I go just writing. Biggest lieI keep thinking I want to sound educated and inspirational, then I go to no, just write what you feel and comes to you. Put your thoughts out there on the screen and someone will be inspired, some way in their life. Sometimes in the midst of my life I think I am full of shit thinking I can write a blog and have people actually follow it let alone even like it. Since my switch from Blogger to here on Word Press I have gained WordPress blog followers. They are other bloggers who may even be real writers not just people like me who thinks it is fun to sit at the computer writing about life thinking that someone needs to know there are real people out there just like them hoping they fit into the world and are worthy of being loved and living their life the way they want.I want to inspire

I am tired today. It is supposed to be my work day but I have no appointments. I do have a lot of errands and work to do at home. It is the Hubs’ birthday party weekend. I am making homemade lasagna, homemade bread and a cake. I think I am going to make a booby cake. It has been a while since I have done one. Today and tomorrow are filled with a lot of homemaker work. So Today, I am slightly questioning my going back to work. This is my ugly doubting self that pears it’s ugly head questioning change when things don’t go smoothly quickly or are too hard. Do I really have time? Will it really work? Will I ever get clients? YES YES YES IT WILL! I think I just need to do a massage, to remind myself that I want to work. Maybe I just need to talk to the Doc or Receptionist to see if they want to be my first massage in my new office (I worked there over a year ago but we have remodeled so it is in a new location). Being in the space and doing massage will solidify my feelings of being there and being all in. I know I want this I just keep running into road blocks and bumps in the road.

Part of why I want to work is to claim my place in this world, not that being a mom and wife is not a place but part of my identity is a Massage Therapist. I am also a wife and a mom but I was Massage Therapist first and I miss that identity. I miss helping patients feel relaxed being the highlight of their day. Now, I know sometimes I am the highlight of my husband’s day but that is after he walked into the kitchen and gasped at the mess that is there. I know my kids love me and it is a highlight of their day when I go to school and help out but when I don’t stay for lunch or the whole day they are disappointed. I always let someone down some way everyday. When I am a Massage Therapist I am the highlight. Yes there are those who hurt after especially if it is treatment from a car accident or some injury treatment work but we work toward getting better, healing, feeling better and relaxing! I love that part of my work and my job.

There is part of me that is mad at myself for needing my job to make me feel good about me and make me feel like I am worthy. It’s not that bad though. I am good at what I do and I love it. I do sometimes feel bad leaving my family to work, which is why I have decided in this stint of work I am working during the school days. A perfect solution. Two days a week, while everyone is already gone at work/school and I get to do what I love. Now I just need clients! I love massage. I need to do some marketing I guess. Time to take my brochure to OB’s in the area (I specialize in Pregnancy massage) and time to go to Dentist offices I also am certified in Intra Oral Massage (great for TMJ syndrome) so on my work days I will be visiting possible locations that I can strum up some clients. Time to work.

On the days I am home I will work on house stuff. Cleaning organizing taking care of me, including eating right and working out. I have kind of slacked off on that recently! I can do this whole Homemaker and Part time working woman thing and blogger at the same time! I know I can and I will. When I am not super perfect “Suzy Homemaker” I will give myself a break and who knows maybe soon I will make enough money I can hire someone to do the things I don’t like to do like the deep cleaning house stuff of scrubbing toilets, dusting and taking care of cobwebs. Ooh that will be so nice, to come home from a long day at work to a spotless house. I used to have that and I loved it. Soon very soon. Gotta go get some clients.

In the meantime, I will continue to write and enjoy it, hopefully I will continue to gather followers and inspire people to have more sex, love like they never have before and wash clothes. I am loving my blog I am loving being Ruby and I will continue everyday in 2015! Now put your clothes in the washer, kiss your kids and go have sex (lock you door). Be you, love you, and accept you for who you are!

#Everyday2015

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